Its just the way I am

I

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Sleep just isn't just sleep anymore.

It's an escape...

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Song - Li Marie Johnson -DNA 

Ida's Pov

The alarm screamed through the room its high pitched cries bouncing off the walls echoing through my mind but my body feels like dead weight. I urge myself push my mind as I struggle to move my arm over and slam it on top of the box of noise. Just that small movement and I already feel exhausted. It feels like someone it sat on my back pinning down my body taunting me not letting me move and everything just feels...numb.

At the foot of the bed, a spare blanket laid discarded sort of half on half off as if clinging on. Sheets rolled and upturned abandoning their stations at the corners of the mattress so they instead gathered in clumps in the centre. A small stream of light cut through the dark mist that hung in the room swallowing the walls drowning them in an unknown depression. Slightly yellowed with age and lack of care I followed the cracks that yawned and stretched across my walls.

Finding some unknown energy I push myself up arms violently shaking scars stretching and clawing at the skin. An overwhelming dread slams down on my back and I fall back onto the bed with an exhausted sigh of frustration. 
"Come on Ida" I whisper rolling over onto my side the weight not lifting "come on," I repeat desperately trying to sit up.

Every movement is so...hard. Finally, I negotiate with my mind to pull away enough weight to allow me to sit up. My stomach drops this time a deep growl erupting from it in protest from last nights skipped meal. With shaky breaths, I lug myself over to the dresser and throw on whatever I find first. The thick jumper brought a small warmth that hugged my body curling around me like a ghost.

I dragged my half-dead mind into the kitchen and collapsed onto the chair my mind clouded with a haze of distress and a wave of hopelessness added to the weight building on my shoulders. The thought of last-minute homework clung to the string of worries laced through my head remembering the history essay on the Cuban missile crisis was due second period. 

Ill have to do it in form I mutter in my head making a mental note before grabbing an apple from the small bowl in the centre of the two-seater table. Slinging my bag over my back I managed to push myself out the door locking it behind me.

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Sticking to the edge of the hallways I hug the wall avoiding everyone I could smiling as people offer small waves.
"IDA! IDA IDA IDA GUESS WHATTTT!" In seconds I'm colliding with the floor a tall blonde squealing on my back giggling like a maniac.
"Vera do you always have to do this," I whimper my wrists igniting in a familiar burning from the exposed cuts hidden beneath the fabric.

It was no lie Vera was stunning. Long bright blind hair bright crystal blue eyes skinny as a stick with long legs. She was like a walking realistic Barbie. She isn't as awful as everyone says. She tends to be clingy and inconsiderate and whiny but she's my only friend here. Or the closest thing I have to one at least. 

She tends to bounce from guy to guy sometimes two at a time but that wasn't any of my business. Shes so busy with her own life she doesn't take any notice of me or ask questions that don't revolve around her...But that's good. 

"Blake Middlewoods just asked me out!" She squealed her perfectly manicured nails framing her sculpted face.
"I thought you were dating Eric Housee?" I questioned pulling myself off the floor.
"Details Ida details" She sang "I just bagged myself one of the fittest jocks in our school" She giggled before seeing someone from the corner of her eye.

"Now him" her hot pint nails pointed to the football captain "He is my end goal" she purred her eyes glazed over with an emotion only describing lust. 
Leo Kai Buria.
It was honestly no surprise he was the team captain of our football team as well as the king of the school. It wasn't just because of his devilishly handsome good looks but his personality as well. Unlike the vast majority, he cared about his grades and his peers which was a rarity... 

But he hung out with the rest of the popular students... Loud fake and obnoxiously confident with an ora of power no one dared to question. They blanked anyone who was 'under' them as well as bullying those who stuck out from the crowds like the nerds or particularly the ones who lacked the sporting ability. 

If there was one thing about the royalty of our school was that they were all sports fanatics... With excellent bodies and all very physically fit if you didn't live up to their standards then you would be their next target. However luckily for me I'm not one of those people and I actually enjoy sports. 

I know the sad lonely depressed girl likes sports, shocker, but its the only thing that offers a great escape from my mind. I finally am able to distract myself and focus on somethnig other than the shitty thing that is reality and my life. 

"Watch it" A deep voice growls as a body clashes against my own.
"Hey baby" Vera purred clinging to the jocks arm dicarding the fact he just threw me out the way.
Before i knew it they were walking away ignoring i existed flirting happily as they disappeared in the group of people. What i didnt realize was my book had been knocked from my hands and were scattered at my feet.

"Hey you okay?" An unfamiloar voice questioned before i felt my books being placed gently back into my hands.
"Yeah," I nodd snappign ot my thoguhts pulling the hardbacked pages to my chest keeping my head down.
"I dont think i have seen you around" The same voice spokeonce again.

This time i looked up only to be met with the bright blue ocean eyes taht belonged to noone other than Leo Kai Buria...