This Love

Where Did Things Go Wrong?

Its been about 2 years since my mom passed away. I still remeber every detail of that morning. The smell of her perfume, the way her hair was wrapped into a bun, and the edgyness in her voice. I had tried asking her what was wrong. Her response was "I'm fine dear. Finish your cereal before your late to school." The response itself was assuring but her smile made it so sure that I left it alone. I felt like I have heard it a million times before. The sound in her voice was the voice she gave whenever I was nervous. But my nerves for highschool were the worst ones yet. I didn't know how it would turn out. She said "Sweetie I want you to have something. It's been passed down generation to generation. Mother to daughter. It'll take your nerves away. You can look at it and think of me and not feel so alone." she smiled at me while tears started to fill her eyes. I never knew what those tears meant. I thought she was coming back later that night to cook us dinner, to ask me how school was, to brush my hair before I went to sleep. For me to actually see her again...

"Mika!" Ms. Rue shouted from across the room. "What's the answer?"

I looked around the room to see the whole class just staring at me. Watching and waiting to hear my answer. I'm not very outspoken so this would probably be the first time they hear my voice for two years of quiet.

"Thirty-two?" I whispered.

"What was that?"

"Thirty-two Ms. Rue! Can we move on?"

I turned my head to see it was Jason. The same Jason who has been in all of my classes since Freshmen year. The same Jason who I have not spoken a word to through all these years. 

"That's right Mika. But do pay more attention next time? Okay class.." I began to drown out Ms. Rue's voice and look at Jason. 

"Your welcome." he said with a smile.

"Uhh.. Thank you.." I said as I began to look down at my books and space out till the bell rang. I got up and began to pick up my books when Jason tapped my shoulder. It took me by surprised so I jumped.

"You should really stop spacing out in class. Even if you're smart you can still make Ms. Rue lose her temper fairly quick." He chuckled.

"Well yeah.. But I just.. I space out alot.. I've been doing it since.. I think ninth grade.." I looked down and resumed to put my books in my bag.

"I'm sorry about.. You know.. With your mom.." He scratched his head not knowing exactly what to say.

"It's fine.. I got to go to Global.. So?" I started to walk away.

"Oh wait!" He started jogging towards me and grabbed my arm. When I looked at him he let go. "You wanna like.. I don't know grab something to eat after school? If.. You know.. If you're not busy and stuff.." He asked and looked around as if he was nervous but I could tell he was acting.

I wanted to laugh becuase of the thought that he was trying so hard to ask me something. I guess he wanted to be an innocent bistandard for once. But instead of me saying no or that I was busy I said "Sure.. Your treat though.." I smirked while I walked away.

The rest of the day went the same as always. One class to the next and before I knew it school was over. I wondered where I should wait for Jason. I started walking to the school yard. I waited about fifteen minutes before I walked around and saw a girl giving some guy head and I realized it was Jason with Brittany behind the school. Brittany my step-sister. I always found her to be kind of slutty. But this takes the cake. She was giving Jason a blow job. I pulled out my cell and started to record it. I ran away before I could start laughing really loud. My step-sister who thought she was so much better than everybody was on her knees giving a jerk a blow job. Usually I have to wait for Britanny to take her home but instead I smiled to myself as I got into my car.

I got home around five thirty. I walked through the door, threw my bookbag on the floor, sat down on the couch and kicked my feet up. Before I could even turn on the tv Jessica walks in and I see her smile vanish as she realizes I walked through the door.

"Where's Brittany?" she asked.

"I don't know." I grinned a little but quickly stopped.

" 'I don't know' What do you mean you don't know? And what was that grin?"

"That grin was me quietly laughing at you for not knowing where your own daughter is. She's not mine I don't have to keep track of her. I waited like fifteen minutes for her to come to the car. She was not there after fifteen minutes so I figured she got a ride from one of her stupid little friends and I left. So where is your daughter? I don't know." I clicked on the tv and started watching Tourchwood:Miracle Day. 

Jessica however kept panicing saying all these things about how "Oh she could be dead," and "She could be kidnapped,". I knew where she was so I didn't have to worry. Cause her precious little girl was in the back of the school giving a guy a blow job. 

Thirty minutes after that fiasco Brittany walked in and I couldn't help but laugh so hard I started to tear. She looked at me like I was a alien. Well she always looked at me that way but this time it was just hilarious.

"What are you laughing at freak?" she shot me a look.

"Oh.. Oh God.. Umm.. Nothing just.. You know this show is funny." She looked at the screen and saw a guy bleeding. "You should've seen how he got injured. Priceless." I wiped my tears and looked back towards the tv.

"Weirdo." She gave me a look and then started yelling as she walked towards the kitchen. "Mom! Mika left me at the school and I had to call my friend so she could pick me up and take me home!" I looked at her.

"She did what?! Mika! Wait till your dad gets home!" she shouted furiously.

"Whatever." I yawned and walked up the stairs to my room to do my homework.

*Couple hours later*

"Stupid ass complicated questions! I don't care about Colombus!" I screamed while I threw my book at the door. My father walked in with arms up. "Don't throw nothing. I just wanna talk." I smiled and then looked down.

"I just don't like history. Relax.." 

"I get you.. So? How was school?" he asked with a silly grin.

"It was fine. Same as always. Lots of, you know, work." I looked around the room.

"Why did you leave Brittany at the school?" he asked. 

I made a grunt noise. "I didn't leave her! She didn't show up. She knows we have a fifteen minutes wait policy! It's not my fault." I started yelling.

"Hey! Calm down. I'm talking calm. So you talk calm. I'm just asking a question. I believe you didn't just leave her but I want to get this solved." 

"FIne. I'll be calm. But I didn't leave her. If she was just there on time this would have never happened. She should be more responsible. I shouldn't have to watch her every move because I'm a month older. Plus it's not my fault she lost her phone and has to wait for a new one. Plus it is not my fault she a little--" 

"Hey! Don't say it! I mean it. Say it your grounded." He scolded me.

"But you know it's true! That's not fair! She can say all these things about me being a freak, or alien or a weirdo and she doesn't get scolded! You're so two sided when it comes to her! I get scolded for leaving the milk out when she left it out! I get scolded for leaving the kitchen a mess when I didn't do anything to the kitchen! The living rooms a mess and it's my fault! Stop being so damn two sided," I shed a tear. "She shouldn't be here! Neither should Jessica! I should have my actual own sibling! My mom should be here! Not this lady who I don't even like or know! My mom!.." I sighed "Just forget it. I shouldn't expect you to understand." I got up and grabbed my sweater off my bed and my keys and ran down the stairs. "I'll be back later!" I said as I slammed the front door.