I'm holding the Bad Boy's boxers...

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Okay guys new story, tell me if you like it. It's instead of tin heart which I am most likely going to put on hold for a month or two, enjoy!

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You know those moments when you're scrolling through your Facebook feed and you hit yet another Relatable/Teenage post, It's right below the:

Like or Satan will murder your mother in your sleep.

which everyone snorts at and scrolls past, only scroll back and like "just to be on the safe side".

Anyway back to the point, this teenage post, the one that reads:

Relatable post number #noonereadsthisbitanyway

Those moments when you realise how completely messed up your life must be, for you to have ended up in this situation.

And it has about 2.5K comments, which consist solely of girls, who have no life and too much internet coverage, saying "OMG! THIS IS LIKE TOTES MY LIFE STORY #CREEEEEPY!"

Well, that isn't my life story, but now, standing outside of my school, on a Saturday, holding a sign that says, and I quote "My dream is of an ideal world where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned." I can, for once, relate to a relatable post.

No, I'm not crazy, well maybe slightly, I guess I bought the sign in the first place. However, it's not for me, if that assures you of my sanity in any way, it's my best friend's birthday present. Before you ask, yes she did request it, no, I don't know why she wants it, and yes, I think she probably is crazy.

As for why I'm outside school, well it's where the nearest bus stop is. I had planned to never step foot outside with this sign, but that plan went down the drain when my Dad's car broke down, forcing me to collect the present on foot.

I've been stood here for the past 10 minutes and a bus is yet to arrive, the weather is horrible and I'm freezing. I try to move my toes and find I can't, I therefore come to the logical conclusion that I'm slowly petrifying and will eventually become as hard as stone, never to speak to my family again. I'm planning my last words when some fancy-ass car pulls up, I figure this must be the chariot of death, coming to drive me to hell.

I'm too caught up in my creative death predicaments, to realise that the driver of the fancy-ass car is trying to get my attention.

"Hey darling, need a ride?" the lady asks.

Okay, I know this is the part where you're meant to run screaming down the road yelling murder or something.

But I have the streetwise survival skills of a chihuahua, seriously I just jump into people's handbags if I see they have chewing gum.

On top of this, I'm carrying this sign, and I'm pretty sure at any moment a man in a white coat is going to come along and take me to the nuthouse. All this is not even taking into account that I'm slowly petrifying here. So I think I'll take my chances with the possible murder. Worst comes to worst I think I can take her, I'm pretty sure my currently non-existent ninja skills will kick in if I'm threatened.

It's with that in mind that I hop into the car. Once I'm inside it begins to dawn on me that I do in fact recognise the woman, and as she pulls up into the house next door to my own, I realise that she must be one of the new neighbours. I had seen her viewing the house a few weeks back, and judging by the removal van outside, I'm guessing today is move-in day.

I jump out of the car and turned to the new neighbour.

"Hey, thanks for the ride I'm Lexi, Lexi Brighton."

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