dark horse [rewritten]

❝ three : don't help me ❞

music recommended - tokyo ghoul's unravel (music box version)

valt's hand were shaking long before valt picked up the phone out of his own will. he stuttered a, "u-um.. hello?"

"valt?" shu felt relieved the blue haired male picked up. "thank goodness, are you okay? diago had a nagging feeling and well, he wanted me to check up on you."

he sighed and thought carefully about how to respond. of course the answer was as obvious as anything, but knowing shu, he'd come over that instant. valt replied, "yeah, everything is fine.. why wouldn't it be? if that's all then, um.. yeah, bye," and then hanged up.

he chided himself for hanging up so quickly, but just holding up a phone made the already existing pain in his wrist shoot throughout his whole arm. shu was surely suspicious now, but that was the least of his worries at the moment.

shu didn't have to burden himself on worrying for him, he knew that he already had a lesser degree of anxiety and he didn't want to be a part of adding to it.

he saw the slits on his wrist forming red beads again and went into the restroom once more, to repeat the clean up and reflect on his actions.

『 later 』

valt leaned against the school's restroom wall, knife in had and wrist covered in a sickingly deep scarlet. 2 weeks ago he got that call from shu, fearing he would burden shu, but now he was burdening himself without knowing it.

within that time span, he'd gotten creative on ways of self-harming. once he even launched his bey wrong, so in the end it would fly out of the stadium at a speed that when it hit his arm, it left a bruise and permanent scar. in the end the beyclub members laughed it out, and shu had just taken him to the infirmary.

everything in valt's life was slowly going to hell, and only up to now was everyone beginning to take notice. his mom saw his unstable diet and the beyclub members were met with the same skeleton like male each day.

even the sport of beyblading couldn't bring a smile on valt's face, and so he abandoned the hobby altogether and left his bey on his dresser, unuser and abandoned.

strangely, just like him.

"what's the point of going on? i could always just end it now." valt spoke to himself, his blade dancing around his arm, leaving blood red footprints.

it was a miracle the pool of blood in the restroom stall was only about the size of a plate.

you know, the scary thing is how easy it would be to just.. leave everything behind. how easy my death would make everyone so happy, valt thought, tears forming in his eyes. but they dissappeared fast as someone walked into the restroom right then and there.

he snapped his head up and was instantly on his feet, worried if the person was the blood on the ground. he grabbed his vest and did his best to soak up the blood on the side that touched his back, despite the pain on his arms.

the steps grew louder as they approached his stall, and valt heard a familiar voice resonating in the restroom. "hey valt? hurry up and come out, we need to talk!"

panic washed over valt. shu stood outside his stall, impatiently tapping his foot on the porcelain floor. in a flash, valt cleaned what he could, gently putting his vest back on and shoving his hands in his pockets without moving them. he forgot about the blade on the floor, and the door opened to reveal a both angry yet worried albino.

shu grumbled, "how long does it take to open up a damn door? it was dead quiet when i came in here, what the hell were you up to?" on the inside, the albino's heart sank. so the rumors were true, he looks unhealthily skinny.

valt.. what happened to you?

valt chuckled nervously and responded with a, "it's the restroom, what'dya think i was doing? anyways, did you need something?"

shu was taken aback. "you.. i, uh, i haven't seen you in a while. i've been getting worried..everyone has. have you been okay these past few days?"

"well of course i'm okay!" valt exclaimed, a fake grin plastered on his face, hurting his face muscles at the attempt of such an expression. "what could possibly be wrong with the infamous valt aoi?"

"shut up."

the white haired male lowered his gaze and let out a shaky breath, scaring valt. "look, you're obviously not okay. i'm asking chiharu if i can sleepover. i want to help you, okay?"

he couldn't believe his ears. valt didn't want someone to find out what he's done, much less worry about him. he deserved to be alone, he didn't deserve the company of others.

shu sighed and began walking out of the restroom. valt yelled after him, "h-hey, i never said you could stay!"

"your mom surely will."

the albino exited, and valt slumped back against the wall, feeling utterly defeated and dissapointed in himself.

『 later 』

shu walked valt to his house, dufflebag in hand and gaze on his friend. they entered his house and headed for the kitchen, where shu set down his contents on the counter and faced valt, with a mixture of worry and dread.

without a single word, he went up the stairway and headed for the bathroom, with the intention of actually going to the bathroom. valt panicked, having remembered leaving very few, but still there, evidence of what he'd done to himself. shu wasn't supposed to see any of that, but he entered before valt could reach him.

he was too late.