It's Fine

Chapter 4

School sort of went on exactly like that, minus the panic attack in the morning thankfully. Faye would get to school, Poppy would go with them to every class and they'd hang out at lunch, and then Poppy would walk Faye home and they'd go their separate ways. Even if they have each other's number, they don't text all that often and haven't actually met up out of school before, Faye's a little too nervous for that, in case the whole 'being nice' thing is just for school and I'd be completely different outside of it. Faye wasn't sure when or if they'd ever meet up outside school, and lowkey hoping they never would just to keep it safe, but life seemed to have other plans.

It was a Saturday, Faye was in the back of the house doing her laundry, it had been a while and even if they don't change clothes often it still packs up and things need to be cleaned eventually. Their mom is currently out of town for the weekend for some work related business so she'd normally be the one doing this but Faye wanted to show that they can actually be useful for once and thought doing their laundry themselves would be a good idea. Faye only had to take care of Muffin while their mom is gone. Ava, their sister, is sleeping over at her best friend's house for the entire weekend, their mom trusts them but not enough to let them take care of their sibling.

While in the middle of moving the clothes in the washing machine to the dryer, Faye hears a chime come from another room and realizes it's probably their phone. After putting the rest of the clothes in the dryer and turning it on, which only takes a couple of minutes, Faye rushes to their room to see who texted them. Expecting it to be their mom asking how they're doing, Faye is pleasantly surprised to see it's actually Poppy.

Poppy: Hey, wanna go out today? I got all my hw done and my mom said it's okay for me to go out and hang with some friends if I wanted to and I've never hung out with you before and thought it would be a fun thing to do.

Oh shoot, the question Faye has avoiding for the longest time has finally come up. Would it be a good idea? What if we meet up and Poppy starts to realize how much of a boring person I am? What if she thinks I'm too clingy or too quiet? Or what if she thinks I'm too loud? What if she thinks I'm too depressing? What if I have a panic attack and she calls me a f-

A chime from Faye's phone cuts off her downhill spirling train of thought.

Poppy: I don't want to make you feel like you're being pressured into hanging out with me, if you have other plans or just don't want to that's absolutely fine.

Faye just sits on her bed, reading Poppy's two texts to them over and over again. The more they read the more they really want to say yes. There's still the endless amounts of really depressing "what if"s floating around, but one of them that's a little different from the others sticks to the front of their mind.

What if I go and everything turns out perfectly okay?

If things go well, that would mean that not only would their friendship be okay but it could also get better, maybe they could hang out more outside of school and talk more and be more open and be more okay. No matter what happens with anything, there's always a chance of something going wrong, but if you're avoiding it just for those recurring feelings you'll never get anywhere, so sometimes it's okay to say fuck it and take a risk. Faye decides to finally throw all caution to the wind and replies to Poppy.

Faye: I'd love to hang out! I'm free all weekend, where do you wanna go?