Who are You?

Hey, I want you to know how I betrayed us. For a long time I was quiet and gentle when speaking to you. Over time I shared dangerous topics with you out of the trust we grew with each other. When people asked me about you I told them you were the most respectable person I have known. Even more so than my parents.

Eventually you became someone I considered a true friend. I need to let you know though the truth about me.

When someone becomes a part of me, I care for them as if they were a brother or sister. They become my family.

I betrayed you though. Over time I saw seeds of anger, hate, loathing, disgust, bitterness, and all the things that choke out and kill any relationship including with the Lord.

I was optimistic though, wanted to see you grow out of it. Instead you thrived in it.

You and your other half became leaches feeding off each other's hatred and disgust. Soon you tried dragging your children/friends into your fights, teaching them hatred.
Instead of owning to it, you threw it onto your other half.

Even still I looked away.

Your anger though wasn't satisfied. How could it? So it turned into your daily practice. It's her fault! It's his fault! You made it your religion.

When I grew tired of dealing with it I tried to reason with you guys only to see you walking around as they chased you. Time and time again until this was your little game.

I know now though this has been your life for a long time. Your family have shown their lives through you. You proved how you deal with guilt and blame. When I asked you to hit me, was the hesitation on how you would hurt me? Or how bad you would look? You certainly would have if it had not been intervened. I made no plans to stop you or doge away.

What I said to you about hitting me was to see who you really were. To prove who you really are.

Through your life you expect praise for doing what you are already required to do. You don't give a cookie to someone who accomplished breathing.

I have forgiven you and don't hold any anger towards you. My mission is what is best for the family and the people around me and always will try to be. I want to sleep in my bed, I want to go through the day, I want to pretend everything's okay, but I can't.

Do you want a friend who backs you up in your bad decisions? Do you want a friend who lies through their teeth? Do you want a friend who isn't really a friend at all? Do you want them to let you go hurt everybody?

Or

Do you want a friend willing to say when your wrong? Do you want a friend who looks after you and your family? Do you want a friend willing to stand in your way from making a mistake?

I love you, but I love my family. I love my father, but I loved my family. I love my mother, my brothers, my sisters, my friends, but I love my family.

My family head, is God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit. If they do not exist, then my love is all for not.

My family and friends are hurt. This is because of your hatred. When the other half falls, should you not be your family's pillar instead of their sinkhole? The world offers nothing for you or anyone else. The Lord is everlasting.

When people hurt, we need to be the big kid. We need to take the brunt of the abuse and still speak with love. We need to love our enemies. Otherwise we become them to our family and friends. There is nothing said or done that can make you do something. No force in the world can control what you do. The one about to hit me wasn't my enemy but my true friend who I would die for.

What do you chose?

(Authors note:)

Again this was intended for a friend who has a family. They were going through a really hard time and I intended to help them in anyway I could that was right. Meaning I wasn't going to help them hurt someone ;)

That is part of the reason why the message was so confusing. I didn't want to change it too badly without compromising the intent. When I sent this I was so scared of what their response was going to be and almost regretted it. I feared that they would want nothing to do with me and had to wait agonizingly long for a response. I was so happy and greatly relieved that they responded in understanding.

Since then it hasn't been perfect, but they have been trying and our friendship and respect actually grew from it. My hope is that this can help you in some way.

Yes, I believe in God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit. If you do not that is perfectly fine or if you have a different belief system. I wanted to express how I truly felt and used part of my belief that has helped me through life for them.

If you don't agree that is fine. To each their own. If you want to express your views or beliefs please do. If I'm wrong or missing something I might as well consider all possibilities right? Just don't be rude without a reason :)

Lastly I hope whatever you go through you can move forward or challenge yourself to consider possibility for this message in the better.

Have a life that blesses others ;)