What happened to the old me

Collins...

When I got home everyone was gone. I went to my room to see how bad my back was. I swear I have about 50 scars from that guy. There were a few new ones, and a ton of blood was dried on my back. I took a shower but it hurt so bad. I know it can't go on like this anymore but I don't know what to do about it. I should probably tell Collins but I don't know. It hurt, but not as bad as my heart.
I went to lay down in bed and put my ear buds in. I later heard a knock on my door. "Hello?"
It was Collins. "Leave me alone!" I snapped. "Devan I'm worried about you" Collins said with a shaky voice, almost like he was about to cry.
"Come in" I finally said. Collins came in and sat on my bed. "How was school little bro?" He asked.
"It was... good" I said
"Well you seem... kinda depressed."
Collins didn't know I had depression, anxiety, etc. but I think I should tell him about my depression....
"Collins..."
"Yes?"
"I am." I said
"You are what?" He asked
"Depressed.... I have depression but it's not a big deal so don't worry" I said looking down.
"Bro what's wrong?"
Before I could answer his eyes widened. "Devan...." he said nervously. "What?"
"What are all those scratches and cuts on your neck...?"
I froze. I didn't know what to tell him. I couldn't tell him about my bully.
"Umm, ohhohoh that." I said laughing nervously.
"Devan. This isn't funny. What is it from?" Collins was scared.
"I was chased by... dogs, yes dogs." I said, he obviously knew I was lying.
"Dogs?" Collins asked
"Yes, totally. You know the Thompson's dogs? Yea it was them." I said lying.
"Uhuh ok. Just come talk to me anytime, you know you can, right?" He asked. "Yea I know..." I said, except I don't want to tell Collins. He already knows too much.

I woke up and went to school the next day. All I can think about was him 'here we go again' I thought. I walked inside and I didn't see him. I got my text books from my locker and headed off to home room, afraid of someone grabbing my hood again like yesterday. No one did.
I sat in class and listen to Mr. Doy talk and blabber about who knows what. But I couldn't focus. I know It's going to happen. I just can't wait to get home so I could I break down.
At lunch I didn't eat. I couldn't. I went to sit at a tab by myself, because like I said I don't have any friends. "Hey wimp." I heard a familiar voice say. I slowly turned around and there he was. "What do you want" I snapped. He tried to grab me but I ran. He chased me down the halls and I started crying tears of fear   He grabbed my arms and dug his fingers into my arm. "Ouch!" I shrieked. He dragged me into the bathroom and swung his fist punching me in the eye. I fell back. He picked up my arm and pulled up my sleeve. I closed my eyes hoping it would be over soon. He made about 10 new cuts. Blood dropped down my arm and onto the floor. I sat there and cried. "Why can't it just be over!?" I cried. But it can't.
When I got home Collins was playing with his cards. "Devan! What happened to your eye!?" Collins asked in fear.
"Collins...."