The Scars She Left Behind

Chapter Nineteen

"Never leave me."

"I promise I won't."

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Go with him? Why? He couldn't just start out saying that? Cocking my head to the side, I urge him to get on with explaining.

"Just come on." He sighs and grabs my arm, dragging me away from the room down to his car.

We didn't exchange much in the car and soon we were pulling into my driveway.

"Why are we at my place?" I ask, royally confused. He didn't answer me, instead he just unbuckles himself and opens the car door to get out. I sit still for a moment dreading what was about to come when I walk through that door.

I gain the little courage I have and step out of the car to follow. Once inside, I can see my parents and everyone else sitting in the living room looking anxiously at my arrival.

I have a really bad feeling about this.

"Bryson." My mom sighs. "Come sit down." She points to the empty spot on the couch next to her.

I stare at the space not really wanting to move at all. Whatever was to come from this, I dread. I didn't have a good feeling about this and just want to head the other direction but I can't.

I'd rather just get this over with than to drag this out so I timidity makes my way to the godforsaken couch and die of embarrassment from this whole situation.

"What is this about?" I say nervously after nobody says anything once I sit down. I don't dare glance up and just focus all my attention on my hands folded on my lap.

"Bryson, we know." My dad comes out and says. I look up confused and now it's everyone else's turn to avoid my eyes. What did he mean, they know? They know what?!

"Wha-what do you mean?"

"I can hear you yelling in your room Bryson." my mom sighs and reaches over to grab my dad's hand. "I know."

"I don't know what you're talking about." I stare at their encased hands. She couldn't possibly be talking about Summer. I refuse to believe that anyone knows.

"I heard you yelling at 'Summer' last night, Bryson." Reese blurts out as I'm having an all-out war with myself, I feel my heart skip a beat in shock. They know.

"What!?" I try to pretend I have no idea what they're on about but it's no use.

"Why are you hiding it?" My mom says and I groan as I hide away in my hands to avoid this conversation.

"You're all delusional. And why are you guys listening in on me anyway?" I lift my head, mad that they'd have to nerve to do so. My mom lowers her head in shame while Reese sulks in his chair.

"I didn't mean to eavesdrop, honestly." Reese mutters and I shake my head at him.

"Why bring this up now?" I advert the conversation before it gets any more uncomfortable. Like that will happen.

"We're set to leave in a week. We just want to be sure you're ready. We can talk with Kevin about waiting to leave." Ryland speaks out, of course he'd be the one to talk about the stupid tour in a time like this.

"No." I angrily rub my eyes to stop myself from looking like a wuss. I cannot break here, not in front of them.

"We've been in contact with several different doctors and they are willing to take on your situation." My mom looks up at me with hopeful eyes. I scoff at everyone and debate if I should just leave.

"I'm not talking to anyone." I've said on many accounts that I didn't want to, and my mind hasn't changed.

"Bryson." My mom gets up and kneels before me making my cheeks flare in embarrassment. "Baby, you need help. This is unhealthy. You can't go on like this, you'll end up hurting yourself or, or worse!" She sobs near the end completely breaking my heart as she grabs onto me as if her life depended on it.

"How long have you known?" I sigh finally somewhat admitting it out loud. I can't go one much longer pretending I don't know. They know and I can't escape that truth.

"A couple of months. I only told your dad last month in hopes you'd tell us first." I close my eyes, trying to process the information being thrown at me. I raise my head to look at the boys wanting their answer as well.

"I only found out last night. I didn't want to confront you so I told them after I heard." Reese lowers his head in shame while the others look away in worry. At least they didn't know as long as my parents had.

"Why didn't you tell us?" My dad talks for the second time.

"I didn't want you guys to worry about me any more than you do." I look down to hide the fact that tears are threatening to fall.

"Oh honey, we're always going to worry no matter what." My mom hugs me tighter. I loosen her grasp a little but it's no use. "Please talk to a specialist, you can choose who you'd like."

I know once I agree to talk to somebody, there's no backing out. I really didn't want to tell someone my true feelings about what happened and how it fucked me up. It's personal to me and I didn't want to share that with anyone other than Summer.

I still have no idea why it happened and it bothers me. One day we're good then we get into a stupid fight over something I don't even remember and then her car's over a bridge and she's gone, out of our lives forever. I refused to think Summer would purposely drive over a bridge to end it all. There were no warning signs. Nothing to predict that terrible event.

It just doesn't make sense. They hadn't found a body either when they pulled the car from the river. They searched miles on either side and still came up with nothing. After a few days of nothing showing up, they declared her dead. Apparently, most people who go missing are dead within the first 48 hours.

I had fought back saying that she had to still be alive but they shot that down immediately saying that they put out pictures of her missing and nobody called in, they check surveillance videos in our town and local airports, but she never came up. She had vanished into thin air. They strongly suggested she was dead.

Everyone came to peace with her being dead but I still couldn't. I say she's gone, for my sake and everyone else's but I don't think I'll ever believe she's gone until I see her dead in person.

I look up to see everyone patiently waiting for my answer but I hadn't got one yet. I didn't want to talk to someone but I also didn't want to be pestered about it every day. It was such an easy choice for anybody but myself. Why did I make it hard?

I gulp down my emotions and close my eyes as I painfully say, "Fine." to something I'd never thought I'd actually agree to.

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