So Close Yet So Far

Chapter 7

After Justin and I finished our dinner, we moved towards the bed, laid down and enjoyed some television. As I was staring at the television, laughing at the comedy, I noticed out of the corner of my eye, that he kept glancing at me with a grin. 

He turned and looked at me, and I looked back. We were seeing eye to eye. His beautiful brown eyes were still shining bright through all the candles. I looked down and blushed. 

Justin slightly moved closer to me, holding my hand tightly, squeezing it like he would never let go. I couldn't help but to feel like he wanted me, and not just in a sexual kind of way.

"You're so beautiful." he said with his voice weakened, showing the biggest smile.

All I could do was blush. I wanted to kiss him. Badly. But I was waiting for him to make a move. I didn't want to kiss him first. I usually like for the guys to make moves first. 

I laid my head on his shoulder, and wrapped my arms around his left arm, snuggling close to him. He looked over, and pushed me away. He sat me up next to him, we looked eye to eye to each other. 

For some reason, my butterflies are gone, and I actually felt comfortable. I looked down while smiling. He pushed my chin up, took his index finger, and gently rubbed my cheek. I slowly moved closer and put our foreheads together. We leaned in, almost getting the kiss. 

*Knock Knock*

I sighed, and huffed a little. He got up and went to the door. I pressed my lips together, annoyed. I turned around to see who was at the door. 

He looked through the spy hole on the hotel door. He turned around and told me, "Hey, um, I'll be right back, sit tight beautiful." 

I kept trying to think of who it could be. No one knew we were here, except the lady at the front desk. Could she have told someone? No, he specifically told her not to. 

I sat here waiting patiently, I heard a lot of talking, so it obviously had to be someone he was close to. I'm usually not the type to eavesdrop, but I got a sudden urge to see what was going on. 

I made my way to the door, and pressed my right ear against it. 

"What are you doing at a hotel, Justin?" said a lady.

"Why does it matter to you, we broke up, remember?"

"Because, you can't just forget about me, and everything we had."

Well, I know who it is now. At that moment, I started to feel angry.

"I'm just here chillin by myself. I needed to think." he said.

"Justin, I love you, and I'm sorry. I know that my jealousy isn't the most perfect thing, but it's a part of me, and it's only because I care about you. Us." 

"Maybe we can try this out and see how it goes because let's face it, I still love you like crazy."

Love 

That word. That's the one word I was hoping he wouldn't say. I felt hurt, betrayed, used. I couldn't help but to cry. He was just about to kiss me. All the words he told me. He kept calling me beautiful, and all of sudden, he acts like nothing happened. 

I opened the door, covering my eyes, trying to hold back the tears. Selena and Justin both stared at me as I was walking. I turned around, threw my hands in the air, continuing to walk backwards, letting him see the hurt I felt. 

"Allison, wait!" he shouted.

"Just leave me alone!" I screamed.

I was so aggravated. I didn't leave the hotel. I just walked around the corner, threw my back against the wall, and slid down. I pulled my knees to my chest, and threw my face in between them. These tears just keep coming. I don't know why this hurts so much. I guess I just feel played. I knew it was too good to be true, I mean I should've known. He was a huge star, and I'm just, ordinary. 

I could overhear the conversation of Justin and Selena.

"Who was that!?" she yelled. 

"She was just a fan, I was helping her stay somewhere, nothing happened." he stated.

Nothing happened? Now I'm broken. I got up, looked around the corner, and they had their arms around each other, sharing a hug. They looked at each other, and kissed. 

This ruined me. I felt like he cared about me, like I was special, like I actually meant something to him. I ran out the hotel door and ran all the way home, that was a long way for me.

I bursted through the door, still crying. My mom was still asleep, so I'm glad she didn't see me like this. 

I made my way up to my room, ripped off my dress, hopped in my bed, and I just stared at the ceiling, still crying.

~~~~

The next morning, I reached over to grab my phone, trying hard to open my eyes. They hurt really bad. I think they're swollen. 

I unlocked my phone and looked at my messages. All from Justin.

"Allison, please call me. We need to talk. I'm sorry"

"I didn't mean to hurt you, we need to talk about last night, please call me back."

"I didn't know she was gonna be there."

It was message, after message, after message. 

I texted him back.

"Obviously, I was stupid for thinking something would happen. You played me like a violin, and I'm not a toy Justin. I'm human." "I'll be halfway descent. Meet me in the park and you can explain, but I'm extremely hurt, and angry." 

I couldn't say no, considering he was trying hard. He agreed to meet me. I didn't know what to say, or how to feel anymore.