Lost soul

Chapter 6:When she saw the silhouette

Alice spent most of her Saturday sleeping and sketching. It somehow became a ritual to her- every Saturday is rest day and every Sunday is getting-pizza-and-stare-at-hot-guys-on-pinterest- day. Oh, or at least it used to be. This was a big step for her, moving on with this whole thing. She saw Madison in art on Friay and she'd still find Madison glancing at her from time to time,confusion and hurt in her stare. She could feel her stomach turning upside down and small drops of sweat dripping down her forehead as her whole body heated up.
Her drawings looked rushed and none of them were finished. Her finger tips were harshly adding pressure on the charcoal pencils, leaving dark lines that will never be come off the paper.

She felt guilty.

But the guilt she felt was not enough to make her body move towards Madison and apologize for running away from her. It's just.. her life now, by herself, felt somehow good. There was a whole storm going on in her head which made her view seem frowned and uncertain, but there were small sun rises breathing through the clouds which looked promising. She didn't want to think that way. She didn't sit next to her for one day and people were asking questions, which made her feel uncomfortable. So she kept herself busy. Also, she felt really dumb for caring so much about others opinion. But it was part of her nature.

She didn't feel judged there. It was just her and the canvas.

Listening to music also helped. Her playlist has so many cheesy songs that so many laugh at, but she couldn't give two fucks. Yes, somehow Selena Gomez made her feel better about herself. Where the problem at?

So, she was spending all her free periods in the art room, just her and sometimes a teacher, drowning in some dark seas no one dared to jump into.

Loneliness.

But she had learnt a precious lesson: sometimes you got to be selfish and put youreself first and not be apologetic about it.
It was going to be hard for her, but she would be able to do it at some point in the future. It's not like she hates Madison or anything. She's not even mad at her. Maybe a bit disappointed. It's just something that only comes from her deepest of depths and she can't control or understand it. They felt like two opposite poles of a magnet yet there was no attraction.

At home, things were not very different. Again, just her and some cold walls. At least she felt more cozy between HER walls.
It was around 6 when she got a mesagae. When she checked, Aiden popped up on the screen. There was a bit of shock, but also excitement. Her brows frowned and she covered her eyes with her fingers.

Why am I acting like a 13 year old hormonal kid?

Aiden: U ok?

Wow. After we kissed he asked me if I'm okay?

Alice: Yeah I guess. You?
Aiden:  Yeah I am good. I was just sitting on the couch, struggling with my dress design.
Alice: Ohh. That sucks.

Jesus, this conversation is dry. Why did he text me if he had nothing to say?  She threw her phone on the couch and stood up to get some popcorn from the kitchen.
When she came back there was another messge:

Aiden: Look, I've been thinking.. I had a lot of fun yesterday. I know you don't know me well, and I don't know many things about you either, but I'd love to get to know you. I want to go to the this art museum in Central London and I'd love to have your company. We could then go and eat something in the park, there's a nice one in that area.I know it sound lame plus I've just asked you out via message but I couldn't wait until Monday. Also, yesterday was.. nice.