Queer Hogwarts

The Hat Looks Where?

As the doors of the Great Hall creaked open, the talking inside seemed to halt immediately. I could hear whispers of "Look! First years!". It was unnerving. All my life I had had fears of being in front of large crowds, and this was the biggest one I'd ever faced.

We walked down the centre of four long tables, two on the left- Gryffindor and Slytherin and two on the right- Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw. Seated on both sides of each of the tables, sat students, in long, billowing black robes, whispering manically. The Slytherins looked at us with distaste, Gryffindors with admiration, Hufflepuffs with kindness and Ravenclaws with intrigue.

We stopped in front of the teacher's table, at the back of the hall, situated on a raised platform. just in front of the table stood a stool with a rather dishevelled looking wizard's hat sat upon it.

An old woman with pursed lips stood behind the teacher's table in the middle and tapped her glass with a spoon. "Can I have some quiet, please? Pay some respect to our new students." She had a stern voice with a thick Scottish accent, rather like my Dad's. Somewhere from the Hufflepuff table came a wolf-whistle. "Mr Lupin, quiet please." Laughter ensured from the rest of the hall. The woman tapped her glass again. "As I was saying before I was rudely interuptted," She glared towards the Hufflepuff table, presumably towards whoever Mr Lupin was. "Please continue with the sorting ceremony, Professor Longbottom."

"Oh, er, right, yes Professor McGonagall." He shuffled up to the hat on the stool. "This year's sorting ceremony is about to begin, it would be swell of you all, if you would be quiet as we have a large group of students to get through." He took a scroll from his pocket and held it out in front of him. He then let go of it. It stayed hovering in mid air. He picked up the hat from the tip and held it above the stool. "This is the sorting hat. It will look inside you and determine which of the four houses: Slytherin, Gryffindor, Hufflepuff or Ravenclaw you will be in. Each of you will come up one by one as I read your name and sit under the hat. When it shouts your house, please go and sit at the appropriate table."

I looked around and everyone looked nervous.

"The hat looks where?" Diana cried.

"Inside you. Inside your soul. It looks at what type of person you are. It then puts you in a house from that." Dean said.

"Oh. I was worried for a second there."

Dean rolled his eyes.

"Askey, James." Proffessor Longbottom exclaimed.

A short, brown-haired boy with glasses shuffled up to the stool. The sorting hat was placed on his head. Almost straight away it shouted "Ravenclaw!"

A cheer rose from the Ravenclaws and the boy sidled over to the table.

"Atkinson, Elizabeth."
"Hufflepuff!"

"Baker, Colin."
"Hufflepuff!"

"Dark, Richard."
"Slytherin!"

"Evans, Simon."
"Ravenclaw!"

Then it was Laurie's turn.

"Fouler, Lauren."

He winced, but slid up to the stool.

"Lauren?" Diana whispered. "But that's a girl's name!"

"Gryffindor!"

I shrugged. Before we knew it, it was the twins' turn.

"Moore, Dean."
"Hufflepuff!"

"What a surprise." Diana rolled her eyes.

"Moore, Diana."

It seemed to think for a moment before proclaiming, "Hufflepuff!"

Watching her face was hilarious, she looked like someone had told her that her grandfather had died or something. Her mouth hung open and she stayed sitting on the stool, utterly gobsmacked. Proffessor Longbottom coughed and she seemed to come back to reality. She blinked a couple of times before walking towards the Hufflepuff table and sank into a seat next to her brother. I smirked. Karma was funny like that.

Before long, my name was called. "Reid, Masie."

I walked up to the stool and sat down. I was breathing very heavily. Would I be put with my friends in either Gryffindor or Hufflepuff, or destined to be somewhere else? I couldn't be in Slytherin. Could I? My Dad had been a Ravenclaw, would I be the same? I looked up and saw the sorting hat descend upon my head.

"Hello." It said.

I cleared my throat. "Hi. I-I'm Masie."

"Yes. I know who you are. You have a very strong mind, Miss Reid. Very strong indeed. You could be put in any of the houses, I think, but I believe that the house that would suit you best would be...Ravenclaw!"

I was a Ravenclaw. It seemed quite fitting. My Dad would be pleased. I slid off the stool and walked towards the Ravenclaw table, my heart pounding in my ears. I realised I didn't know anybody, who was I going to sit next to? How should I introduce myself? Would I have to ask someone to move up? My breathing got heavier and my fingers interlocked and unlocked without my consent. I stumbled to the table and prepared myself for humiliation.

"Hey," An older girl with black hair in a bob gestured to me to sit down next to her. "I can tell you're nervous, we're not going to hurt you, don't worry." Her voice was soft like silk and she spoke gently. "I'm Rachel Smith, seventh year. I'm a prefect. I'll be showing all of the first years around for your first few days." She smiled.

"I'm Simon!" The boy sat opposite me exclaimed. "I'm a first year too!"

"I'm James!" The boy sat next to him said. "I'm a first year."

"I'm Helen!" A girl sat next to me suddenly shouted, making me jump. "Sorry! I'm a first year."

In fact about ten people sitting around me were all first years. I was confused as to why all the first years were in one place. I asked Rachel.

Rachel laughed. "This is not all of the first years. Only the ones who don't have siblings in higher years to sit with. It's a new strategy we're using this year to become a more welcoming house. I was talking to Jemima, one of my Hufflepuff friends and she said that this is the way they greet their students. It seems like a great way to introduce you to each other and reduce the anxiety caused by communication in many young magical people today. Now hush, Professor McGonogall is about to speak."

The sorting ceremony had finished and Proffessor McGonagall was welcoming everyone back to school. "Now I know what you're all waiting for." She paused for a moment.

"Get on with it woman!" Mr Lupin cried.

"Shut up Teddy!" I heard someone shout. So this Lupin guy's name as Teddy.

"Let the feast begin!" Proffessor McGonagall proclaimed.

All of a sudden great mountains of food erupted onto the table in front of us. Everyone dug in and was delighted at how good everything tasted.

"The house-elves have really outdone themselves this year, haven't they, Rachel!" Someone shouted over my head.

Rachel laughed and nodded, "Yes, they have Percy!"

When I had eaten all I thought I could, including roast chicken, Yorkshire puddings and a rather large handful of vegetables, the food disappeared and was replaced with deserts of all varieties and I suddenly felt ravenous again. The cheesecake was amazing and the apple pie was almost on par with my Step-Mum's.

After the big meal, I felt rather sleepy. I looked up to see hazy grey people floating through the air. It must have been the food, I'd eaten so much, I was hallucinating.

"Ah! The ghosts! A little bit late this year." Rachel said. "What's up Helena!"

A rather timid looking ghost glided towards us. She was young and had a pretty face. She smiled serenly. "Nothing is up, except the ceiling, the sky and the universe beyond."

"One day I'll get you to learn these modern colloquialisms." Rachel sighed and the ghost drifted off, smiling.

McGonagall stood up. "I think it is time we all went to bed. Prefects, please escort the first years to the dormitories."

"Well, time to go kiddos." Rachel laughed. She gestured for us to follow her and called for any first years not with us. Once she'd collected us all there were at least twenty of us. "To the tower!" She cried.