I've Lost Who I Am (Magi:A Labyrinth of Magic)

Chapter 1: We Are Lost and We're Falling

*Disclaimer: I do not own any of the character in this story, neither do I own the music lyrics which is used for the title of this story and it's chapters.

Warning: Out of character, manga spoilers and smut.
Please excuse any of the mistakes I may have missed whilst editing this.*

"Big brother Kouen!!"

"No! Give him back!"

"Quiet, boy. Such disobedience will not be tolerated,"

Red, tear filled eyes widened in fear, small body tense from where it had carelessly been tossed over the shoulder of a tall, broad man from Al-Thamen. Still, one small hand was stretched out to another man. Kouen had a frantic look on his face, body frozen for a mere moment.

"You have to save him, brother!" Koumei encouraged, and it was all the eldest needed.
Kouen lurched forward, right hand reached out, ready to grab the pale, much smaller hand of his little brother.

Five other members of Al-Thamen stepped in his way, preventing him from reaching the tiny boy, grab him and hug him to his chest, hide him in his big, strong arms, much like he had been doing for the past few weeks.
"No! Judar!!" Kouen yelled, struggling against the five men.

"Judar!" Koumei ran forward, passed the five men who were able to hold his big brother down. Judar reached out to Koumei, their fingertips brushing before Koumei was lurched back, by another, sixth member of Al-Thamen grabbing him, holding him back as the last, seventh member carried Judar away.

Kouen and Koumei continued to struggle, yelling for their little brother, screaming at the men to just give him back!
"Enough! Don't make his punishment worse than it already will be. Should you carry on like this, he will be punished by death, no matter that he is a Magi," one of the men holding Kouen down warned.

The words caused the two brothers to freeze, eyes widened as they slowly relented. The men stepped back, and in an orderly fashion, nearly as one, they turned to walk off after the other carrying Judar.

Judar stilled at the sight of his two brothers giving up, body growing limp at the all too familiar scene. The memory of a city around him, different people surrounding him, but one in particular harboured all his attention.

Judar had also been thrown over the shoulder of a member from Al-Thamen, back then. He had had tears in his eyes, looking expectantly at the man in front of him, waiting.
'He'll save me. I know he will,'

Tears fell down his cheeks as he watched the man turn his back on him, long, purple hair whipping around at the movement and wind. Judar watched, heartbroken as the man started to walk away from him, leaving him at the mercy of Al-Thamen.

'Sinbad,'

The man carrying him put him down on his feet, intending to grab his wrist and drag him away. Judar wrenched his arm away, small hands clamping over his ears as the memory left him. Tears streaming down his cheeks, Judar started to scream at the top of his lungs, the Rukh around him started to flutter wildly, chirping frantically as they tried to calm the Magi.

Kouen and Koumei watched with widened eyes as the Rukh started to become visible to them. They were such a beautiful, white, golden colour, until suddenly, some of them started to grow grey, the colour steadily spreading until all of the Rukh were grey, slowly turning darker and darker, until it was all black.

Kouen grit his teeth, Koumei biting his lower lip to try and prevent himself from bursting into tears. The men from Al-Thamen watched, thoroughly pleased that they had been able to throw the young boy into depravity.