Fionna was visiting her mother for the 100th time! Probably more. Who's counting here!? Well I get to be staying at the swamp with my kids and Donkey's kids. I'm tired of this! Thomas' wedding is tomorrow and I don't wanna show up with a beer belly and looking like a middle aged man who's been living in the dumpsters my whole life! I live in a swamp! Not a dumpster! Big difference!
Most of the time I'm gone I'm at the studio doing some Shrek movies. And because of those movies I get sent some fan art. Most of them are pretty disturbing, cool, creative, weird, and gross. Like. Who's this Trump guy that people are comparing me to? So, yes, I want a wall that separates my swamp from the outside world but then Trump wants to build a wall to keep out Mexicans? So we both want to build walls what's the big deal? And I was sent this one picture of Batman embracing me while I have Sonic the Hedgehog in my womb. How does an ogre and a Batman create a Sonic?
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~Time Skip~
Fionna and I were just about to leave to go to Thomas's wedding until she found the mail. The fan art. The regrets. "Who are these people!?" "I don't know! I get this stuff 2 days a week and I don't know where it's coming from!" "Shrek x Shadow from Sonic!?" "Like I said! I don't know where this comes from!" "Shrek x Donkey!?" "Why would I wanna be with that thing my entire life!?" "I don't know but there's 24 fan fictions explaining why!" "What!?" "Shrek x Trump!?" "I don't know how to explain any of this to you." "ARE YOU CHEATING ON ME!?" "No I'm not! Why would I do that?!" "MAYBE BECAUSE YOU THINK DONKEY'S MORE THICC!" "Thicc?" "YOU CAN GO TO THE WEDDING BY YOURSELF!"
And just like that. She stomped out the door and I never saw her since.
~Time Skip~
I was depressed. I didn't know what to do anymore until I met Y/N. She looked so beautiful in that wedding dress and was a sight for sore eyes. While walking down the isle I got a great look at her eyes. They were as beautiful as her. But I knew that she was Thomas's already. So I decided to forget about her.
I went to another Fairy Godmother since the other one died lmao. I told her to make me forget about Y/N and Fionna. But then. When Thomas and Y/N came to visit it was the same thing all over again. Like I met her for the first time again. But this time. I wanted Y/N to be mine. I didn't care that she was with Thomas anymore. I didn't care she was married. I didn't care about anything.
