Medicate

Medicate

Summary:

Song Fic inspired from the song Rx (Medicate) By Theory of a Deadman

Daryl's thoughts about him and Merle before the apocalypse and why him and Merle use alcohol and drugs to escape the past abuse that him and Merle have been through.

I do not own anything Walking Dead or the Song Rx (Medicate)

Wake up to a cloudy day
Dark rolls in and it starts to rain
Staring out to the cage-like walls
Time goes by and the shadows crawl
Crushin' candy crushin' pills
Got no job, mom pays my bills
Textin' ex's get my fill
Sweatin' bullets, Netflix-chills
World's out there singin' the blues
Twenty more dead on the evening news
Think to myself "really, what's the use?"
I'm just like you, I was born to lose

The sound of the thunder rolling outside the window woke me from a light, nightmare filled sleep. My head pounded. I groaned as I slowly opened my eyes and sat up. A wave of nausea hit me as I looked across the room to see Merle passed out on the other couch. His arm thrown over his eyes. An empty liquor bottle in his other hand. I could hear him snoring softly. Beer and liquor bottles lay scattered across the room from the previous night's drinking and partying. I reached towards the coffee table and grabbed a blunt out of the ashtray and lit it. I took a slow, long drag, inhaling the sweet evergreen taste of marijuana. I smiled as the nausea quickly died away. I would have to ask Merle where he got the weed and see if we could get some more.

Why oh why can't you just fix me?
When all I want's to feel numb
But the medication's all gone
Why oh why does God hate me?
When all I want's to get high
And forget this so-called life

I am so frickin' bored
Nothin' to do today
I guess I'll sit around and medicate (medicate)
I am so frickin' bored
Nothing to do today
I guess I'll sit around and medicate (medicate)

I took another drag before I stood up, laying the blunt in the ashtray, and walked into the small kitchen to the beat up old fridge. The door squeaked loudly as I pulled it open the only thing in it was an old take out box, which I was sure from the smell, had something growing in it, a half a case of Coca-Cola because I liked Jack and Coke and a case of beer. I grabbed a bottle and used the metal bottle opener that was mounted on the wall beside the fridge and drank half of it. I walked back to the couch and sat down. I looked around at my dismal surroundings. The sound of thunder rocked the crappy trailer me and my brother lived in. The coffee table in front of me was littered with cigarette wrappers, a bag of weed, a bottle of pills and shot glasses. I took another swig of my beer before unscrewing the bottle of pills and pouring 4 in my hand. I popped them in my mouth and washed them down with the last of my beer.

Can't wait to feel better than I ever will
Attack that shit like a kid on Benadryl
Chase it down with a hopeful smile
Hate myself, if I can go for miles
They say family's all you need
Someone to trust can help you breathe
Inhale that drug, but you start to choke
You follow the outs of an inside joke

Why oh why can't you just fix me?
When all I want's to feel numb
But the medication's all gone
Why oh why does God hate me?
Cause I've seen enough of it, heard enough of it, felt enough of it
Had enough of it!

I got up and silently walked to my room. I pulled my filthy shirt off and collapsed onto my small twin bed and closed my eyes, listening to the rain pounding against the trailers tin roof. My mind drifted as the pills took effect. I wanted to be taken far from the nightmares of the past. Away from the pain of my father hitting my mother and then taking his rage out on me when I screamed at him to stop. I was five the first time he punched me and gave me the black eye and split lip that made it impossible for me to go to school for over a week.

Medicate
Medicate
Medicate
Medicate

The sound of my mom crying in the next room as my father screamed at her. Merle was gone. I couldn't remember if he was on a bender or in Juvie again. It made no difference, he wasn't there to help us, no one could help us.

Superman is a hero
But only when his mind is clear though
He needs that fix like the rest of us
So he's got no fear when he saves that bus
All the stars in the Hollywood Hills
Snapchat live while they pop them pills
All those flavors of the rainbow
Too bad that shit don't work though

The smell of the smoke that filled my lungs as I ran towards the flaming house that used to be my home.

Your friends are high right now

Your parents are high right now
That hot chick's high right now
That cop is high right now
The president's high right now
Your priest is high right now
Everyone's high as fuck right now
And no one's ever coming down

The Pain of being beaten because I hadn't been home to stop mom from being a dumbass and dying and how it was it my fault.

Why oh why can't you just fix me?
When all I want's to feel numb
But the medication's all gone
Why oh why does God hate me?
When all I want's to get high
And forget this so-called life

I quickly sat up, feeling the tears roll down my face. I wiped them off angrily and walked back into the living room. Merle was awake and sitting up, filling a needle with pure clear liquid. He looked up and handed me the syringe seeing the look on my face and picked up a lighter and spoon and started getting his own ready. I sat down beside him and wrapped the stretchy plastic around my arm and slid the needle into my vein. The rush of the drugs filled my body. I sighed and leaned into the back of the couch the tension in my muscles fade away as I slipped into a blissful state and wishing I never had to come down.

I am so frickin' bored
Nothing to do today
I guess I'll sit around and medicate (medicate)
I am so frickin' bored
Nothing to do today
I guess I'll sit around and medicate

Medicate
Medicate
Medicate
Medicate

I medicate