BananaBirdy & Lessae's Crazy Book of Insanity

The Monkey's Side of the Grapefruit

"Well, monkey! It's nice to see you again!!! Now tell me how's the grapefruit? It's been a few months since you two last got married!!!!" I say sitting in my rocket shaped head!! Yes my chair is a head that is shaped like a rocket! It also comes with free wifi!! Woohoo!! Also available is the orange rainbow polka-doted lunch box!!!!! Can I get a what, what?!!!!

"Oooooo oo oooo ooo ooooooo aaaa aa a a aaaaaaa oooo aaa ooooaaa!!!!!" She said in return sitting in her purple zebra chair. Now this wasn't any ordinary chair!!! It was my 14299 limited addition purple talking zebra hair chair!!!!! This chair hasn't come out yet in any other country because its not supposed to come out until 14299, but I got it for free many years early!!!! How did I get this you ask!?? Well, do expect me to tell you all my secrets in the first two chapters!!! You are crazy!!! But then again my craziness level will always be higher than yours by 128.5792746%! Don't judge me!!!!! I do my math!!!!!

Did you know that 100987645323% of people will stop reading this book by the third paragraph. But you should be special and be one of the .000000000000000001% who enjoy insanity. ENJOY IT! i command you. Partly because i am wearing a crown.In case you didn't know, that I this paragraph. I will now have the monkey go on a five minute break.

While the monkey is on her break, we are going to interview a fellow wattpadian; Cleopuss!

Us: So, Cleopuss. How has life been?

Cleopuss: gut.

Us: That's weird! Well, anyways lets talk normal! ...If penguins could float in your eyes, then how much chicken would you eat?

Cleopuss: None! Because I wouldn't want to eat if my eye were in Payne!!!

Us: Bad answer and why are your eyes in Payne?

Cleopuss: they aren't in pain, but if they were...

Us: No!! In PAAYYNNEE!!!!!!! Get it? Payne...

Cleopuss: NO!!!!! Ewww!!!! That's gross!!! They are not in Liam Payne!!!!!

Us: That would be cool!!!! You could see what he was seeing and be able to see and be all like, "oh now they are on stage!!"

Cleopuss: That would so not be cool!!!! That would be disgusting!!!!

Us: Ok next question! What is your favorite hair color?!!!

Cleopuss: It's penguin or green!!!

Us: Ummm...that is an unnecessary answer!!! End of interview!!!!!

Now, we will recite the alphabet.

A. A is a letter. If you didn't know that, you're amazing. If you did know that, you're absurd.

B. B is a letter. If you didn't know that, you're brilliant. If you did know that, you're berserk.

C. C is a letter. If you didn't know that, you're cool. If you did know that, you're crazy.

D. D is a letter. If you didn't know that you're duh bomb. If you did know know that you are a dork.

E. E is a letter. If you didn't know that you are editing. If you did know that you are Eric! Yes, it because the monkeys brother is named Eric and I don't (do) have a crush on him!!

F. F is a letter. WAIT HOLD ON!!!!!!!! I know you are like OMG this is going on forever, but don't worry I will stop after Z. Plus, don't you want to know what you are if you know or don't know a letter? No? LESSAE HELP ME THE DONT WANT TO READ THE ALPHABET ANYMORE!!!!!! *tear**tear**tear**tear**tear**tear**tear**tear**tear**tear**tear**tear**tear*

Lessae: Way to go, readers. You made BananaBirdy cry. *Hugs BananaBirdy and tells her it'll be okay, and to stop crying so we can get on with the alphabet.*

BananaBirdy: I DONT WANT TO GET ON WITH THE ALPHABET UNLESS MONKEY'S BROTHER ERIC IS HERE!!! I mean... Wha???? I didn't just say that!!! On with the alphabet!!!!

Now where were we... Ohh yes! F. F is a letter if you didn't know that you are fantabulous! If you did you are freaky!!!!! Oww!!!!

G. G is a letter. If you didn't know that you are gorgeous! If you did know that you are a great gorilla with grey hair! And no I don't know that kind of gorilla! Pshh!! What are you talking about?!!

H. H is a letter. If you didn't know that you are HILARIOUS!!!! If you did know that you are....ummm....hungry? Maybe? Ok, no! BUT YES YOU ARE!!!! I KNOW!!!!!

I. I is a letter. If you didn't know that you're INZAYN!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!! Get it INZAYN? No, ok! Anyways, if you did know that you're impossible to deal with!!!! Almost worst than Eric!!! Wait, no! I meant Monkey!!! Ok let's change the subject!!!

Lessae: How about rainbow water bottles?

BananaBirdy: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!!! Rainbow water bottles?!!! LET ME SEE!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lessae: See? It's right here.

BananaBirdy: Umm...I could go to the sea and find if that's what you mean?

Lessae: No! I have one of them right here, but only have one of them from the whole collection, and it's clear.

BananaBirdy: HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO SEA THAT SEA IF....

Lessae: umm...you spelt sea wrong!!!

BananaBirdy: How do you hear what I spell wrong?!!! Are you a specially trained monkey that can disguise yourself to look like a human and read minds and correct their mind grammar?!!!!

Lessae: No that's the whale in your head!!!

BananaBirdy: HOW DID YOU KNOW ABOUT WILLY THE WHALE?!!!! He...he DOESN'T EVEN KNOW YOU!!!!! You have to be a trained monkey that disguised yourself to look like a human and read minds and correct their mind grammar!!!!!!!! Right?

Lessae: you've told me about the whale... Anyways, BACK TO THE ALPHABET!!!!!!

BananaBirdy: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! *lessae raises her eyebrow* What I don't know what the next letter is? It could be a monstrous!!

Lessae: Fine lets go eat lunch with... Eric!!!

BananaBirdy: *gasp* He's here!!!! *runs out the door*

Lessae: And there she goes!!! Better go join her!

MORE TO COME.... MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!