Saving the one I Love [MxM]|√

Twenty - One

Everyone has a few secrets of their own. Elijah was no exception. He had a small box tucked away in the back of his mind to the point he almost forgot about those secrets. But he couldn't -- no mattered how hard he tried he couldn't forget them. He'd let it slip maybe once or twice but it would always come back to  haunt him. Like the a nightmare waiting for him to close his eyes and succumb to the terrors it bought.

Simple things that made him remember them. The reason why his mother was away travelling the world, the reason he left the comfort of his home to settle for an apartment. Those very reasons reminded him of the things he wanted to forget. What would you do if that box was pryed opened by force? Opened by someone who had no right to? Force out all the emotions you didn't want to express? And worst of all opened it in front of the one person you didn't want to know?.

Elijah felt vulnerable, his walls completely shattered and his emotions entangling each other. He wanted to feel the constant feeling of love he felt over the last weeks. The only feeling he wanted to feel, he loved it. How it made him see things he's never had before, wonder into welcoming territories like a paradise sitting before him. Now, he didn't know what he felt-- anger, sorrow or regret. He feared what Scott would think of  Mikey's words. That he would loose him if he dared to look in his eyes and see how disgusted he was by him.

Elijah had to hold himself together, he couldn't break all over again. He found the courage he needed. He had the person he longed for. Elijah promised himself that whatever Scott's answer was he was okay with it. He would have those memories, the unforgettable times they spent together. He would cherish them -- cherish the fragile memories that could break at any point and wonder from his memory. But as he stood in the silence, he felt that everything was lost already.

Elijah wanted to cry, curl up in a blanket and cry away all the unsettling feeling. He wanted to smile brightly as he used to, have cheerful conversations with Scott like they usual do. But he couldn't. Even the brightest days experience rain.

"Elijah" Scott said, his voice was sooting, like a calm passing wind. Elijah chewed hard on his bottom lip, holding back his whirlpool of emotions. "Are you okay?" He reached out to touch Elijah's hand but he was too overwhelmed that he avoided the touch.

He didn't mean to, he wanted to hold onto Scott's hand like he usual did. Intertwine them and feel the pulsing heat between them. He didn't want to see the dejected look on Scott's face, and knowing he was the cause hurt more. Elijah was afraid to approach and even more afraid to retreat. Why did things have to end up like this? Elijah buried his face in his hands, as if he could hide back what was already in the open.

"Can we leave?" He muffled in his hands, dragging them along his face and through his hair. Already getting up before Scott could reply.

Scott followed slowly behind him as they exited pops. The place that officially kick started everything and might even end something that's becoming something so beautiful. Elijah's feet felt heavy, each step harder than the next or was it just his heart, already preparing the bandages to slap onto the broken pieces.

"I'll drive" Scott said, holding his hand out for Elijah's car key.

"I'm fine, I'll drive" Elijah said in low voice almost inaudible. He knew how Scott got when it came to cars. He wasn't going to make because of his own reasons Scott would put himself through something like that. 

Scott stepped in front of him, his hands still outstretched waiting for the car keys. "I know I'm not the best when it comes to cars but I want to do this"

Could Elijah refuse those eyes that cared for him. Those eyes he's stared into countless tines and lost himself because they were so beautiful. He didn't know for how much longer they stood on the side of the road or when it started to rain. But when Elijah handed over the car keys and his tears were mixed with droplets of rain that streamed down his face. He was glad it rained, for this once he'll allow himself to fall after so long.