One More Time

/ Now everybody's dead

Matthew Healy

I stared into the casket.

She lay peacefully inside, it felt like she was sleeping. She didnt look dead to me. She looked so alive. It felt like she was breathing under her white dress, and I had that urge to reach out to her and shake her to wake up from her slumber.

"you can manage.."

"she's in a better place now."

"we pray for her and you everyday.."

"you're strong. be strong.."

Their words kept ringing inside my head as the rain poured down angrily. Everyone had their black umbrellas up and I didnt even blink, or move out of the way. The rain had drenched my suit and I remained unmoving. It was cold. I was wet and fully drenched under the rain. But I felt the pang of hurt everytime I look away from the casket. I felt like staying here, instead of turning away from her.

I glanced away and looked at the people behind me. The band was under their large dark umbrellas, looking through me with tired but sympathetic eyes. They were with me from the start.. and they still are as I stood on her grave. It was so heartbreaking.. I cant feel my tears running on my cheek as the rain poured on me. I didnt want people seeing me cry, but this time.. I didnt care. I left all the cares in the world the moment she died.. the moment my world stopped when I answered the phone call.

/

"is this Matthew Healy?"

"yes why, who is this? why are you calling from my girlfriend's number?"

I could practically hear all the sirens blaring from the other line, and the heavy downpour of rain. It rained so much in Michigan, and I started to get worried when the man from the other line took too long to answer.

"Ms. Silver got in an accident."

Accident?

"tell me she's alright. let me talk to her" my voice was wavering and frantic.

"we're rushing to the hospital right now. And she couldnt talk, the accident is really bad. And she's hurt herself very badly"

the noises were so loud from the other line. And we were starting to lose each other. Next thing I knew, the line went dead and I was dialling a number.

Am I being pranked?

/

It felt so unfair when something you love is taken away from you. It feels as if my heart had been crushed a hundred times when she was taken away from me. It hurts so much that it was too soon..

"I miss you already, Jamie"

--

am I mean to kill off the character you guys loved?

sorry. Im dark and evil like that.

dont hate me