Her Fragile Skin //Camren// (COMPLETED)

Lost

Lauren POV

These last few days have been hard on me. REALLY HARD. Ever since I visited Taylor at the hospital I've felt myself become depressed. I wouldn't eat, barely drink, feel beyond tired, and I wouldn't socialize. Of course now that I'm back in Miami, I had to start school. Which was honestly not the most exciting thing anymore. I just wanted to be home... with Taylor.

School didn't feel comfortable to me anymore. All the staring and whispers of other students. I couldn't help but feel anxious. I never looked the best when I went to school. I barely tried with my outfit and makeup. My hair was a bit messy sometimes. And I always looked so dull. At least that's what I hear.

My teachers, being the nosiest people in the world, wanted to know what was going on with me. Sure I may be a new student to the whole school, but that doesn't mean I would easily give in with these teachers. I would either tell them to mind there business or I that I didn't want to talk about it. They won't constantly ask, but at times they do. I just ignore them. I didn't have time to deal with it.

As for my friends. They didn't take it well. Dinah always has a heart attack, Normani tries to be strong, but cries when she's me,Ally claims she is always praying for me, and for Camila... she never let's her eyes leave me. It's like she's constantly scoping out to watch my behavior and see my changes. I found it a bit odd, but I mean it's Camila so who am I kidding?

The days went by slow. It seemed like countless hours in the halls, classrooms, and every part of the school. Hours that I could be spending to see Taylor at the hospital and be by her side, but instead wasting them here at this school. What's the point anyway for me coming here? It's not like I'm paying attention to a damn thing in class. Plus I'm not in the mood to be a social butterfly and explore what's going on around the school and the current events happening in my friends lives.

And the end of the day I always end up the same.

My friends always offer rides home. I decline all the time.

You don't need that.

They always offer company.

You don't want that.

They want to know what's going on.

Keep your mouth shut.

They're worried.

So what?

They want to help.

I'm helpless.

They care.

Yeah right.

Constant voices are in my head. Slowly controlling me and leading more into depression. At times I feel like I'm not worth it any longer. Not that I normally have such thoughts. It just seems right.

I couldn't possibly do it though. Image the pain I would leave behind if I ever committed such thing? I would only be hurting more. Not just myself, but others too.

But I still felt like I needed it.

Talk to someone.

No

Call someone.

Forget it.

Tell the truth.

Tell a lie.

I banged my head against the wall of my room. Trying to relieve myself from the voices. Trying to see if I can make such pain go away. It doesn't work.

I don't remember the last time I've felt so depressed. Sure I was sad with deaths in the family or when my friends we're in distress, but when it came down to my sister. I felt broken. Weak. Lost.