Letters To You

Prologue Part One. The Clinic

I sat in the uncomfortable blue chairs. Rereading the stupid posters they put up on the plain beige walls. I put a hand on my threr month old tummy. Mentally apoligizing to him or her.

The doctor called me in. I stand up and followed him in the tiny room. The room was tiny. Too tiny.

"I have to warn you about health risks that are invo--" The doctor said but I cut him off.

"I know what I'm doing. I want this." I said and looked down at the ground.

He nodded and handed me a red cup. He left to do something and I just stared at it's contents. Clear liquid sat in the cup as I swirled it around.

What am I doing? I ask myself. I felt the cup slip through my fingers. I grab my bag and head out the clinic. I sit in my car just crying for the longest time.

"I'm sorry. Did I scare you back there? I didn't mean to. I was just scared that your father will be an asshole and kills you himself. But that's okay. I won't let him hurt you. I will never let anyone hurt you. I am sorry my little angel. I'm sorry I tried to let them hurt you. Don't you worry sweetie, momma's here to protect you." I say as I cried and held my growing bump.

I knew I had to tell trevor (a.n ugh fucking trevor) sooner or later. But I'm scared. He's a drunk psychotic bastard.

Before I drive home I grab a pen and a paper and write my little angel a letter.