BTS - BLACKPINK One-Shots [CLOSED]

leave me and don't come back pt. 2 - HopeRose

Here's the part 2 :)

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I was cleaning up my room, throwing out papers and things I didn't need.

"Honey?"

I snapped my head up from what I was doing to see my mom peeping through the door.

"Hm?"

"I just wanted to check on you." She said with a soft smile. She sat besides me on my bed and I continued to rummage through old papers. "How are you feeling?"

"What do you mean?" I asked not looking at her.

"Well, Hoseok's mother called me the other day saying you went over."

I stopped what I was doing, the sudden thought of Hoseok making my heart beat twice as fast. My lip twitched and I went back to looking through my papers.

"Yeah. I did."

She sighed beside me and wrapped her arms around my shoulders lovingly. "You know I'm always here for you. You can talk to me."

I bit down on my lip halting my rummaging again. I blinked and my jaw clenched not knowing what to say.

"I went over, they invited me for dinner but I didn't stay." I told her sternly. "I'll be okay mom."

"Are you sure, I can always—"

"Mom." I stopped her abruptly. "Can I please finish sorting through my things?"

I know she meant well. And I felt a little bad pushing her away like that but I wanted some space. Especially since those past feelings were lingering again.

She nodded and left the room without a word. I now sat there frozen thinking about what Hoseok told me. I loved him at the time but I was hurt. I didn't want to forgive him but a part of me wanted to run back in his arms. I was stuck with conflicting feelings and now I didn't know what to do.

I stood up and approached my closet reaching for a small box hidden in the corner under a shelf. I sat down on the floor and started to go through it. It was all memories I had with Hoseok that I had been too stubborn to throw away. I stared at the pictures with him and I remembered again how in love we both were. We used to be inseparable. Now it was as if we never knew each other. Past all the pictures and letters we wrote to each other, I found a tangled up silver necklace. A sudden involuntary tear fell from my eye as I ran my thumb against the charm. It was the first genuine gift he gave me. Even if he gave me bears and won prizes at carnivals, this was the only thing I needed to keep. I wanted to keep. He showed his love to me through this necklace. I remembered that I never wanted to take it off. When the whole break up thing set, him coming back and acting as if he had never knew me, I had to. I sniffled at the memory and put it back in the box for safe keeping.

I was older now but I still didn't have the guts to throw any of it away. He was my first love. Nothing can change that. Even if I didn't want to think about him.

Actually, he was the only thing I thought about these past few days. I didn't cry, I wasn't angry. I felt conflicted. I wanted him so bad but there was just something there that told me no.

But honestly, I was afraid.

What if he made me want him so bad that I forgive him for everything?

I would never be able to forget, but there was something in my heart that wanted to forgive him. I just loved him unconditionally. Effects of having him as my first love.