If suicide had a day

A day in the summer

Today is June the 22nd. I was raped this afternoon by my own father. My mother by that time had already been gone because she was at work. As for my father he had his day off, but something was off about him.

While I was watching tv he came and sat beside me. "Hey kiddo, whatcha what watching?" He said. "I'm just watching some reruns of Pokémon." I said. "Oh that's cool." Right then and there I got a sense that something was wrong because I felt him inch closer to me and wrap his arm around my shoulder and his voice reeked of alcohol. Yet he didn't say a word as he looked at the tv screen. I brushed it off as nothing. Though the next thing that happened sent a chill down my spine and made my stomach churn. He began to kiss my neck which tickles but made me so very uneasy. "Dad stop! What're you doing??" I said in a panic. "Don't worry sweetheart. Daddy's just going to make you feel good." He said. I didn't like it regardless of what he said and tried to push him away, but in revolt he pinned me down to the couch and kissed my neck again before kissing me directly on the lips. I cried a bit there not knowing or understanding what was going on. My body began to freeze in fear and my heart pounded against my chest as I cried. He smiles at my tears. "Awwww, there's no reason to cry. I'm not going to hurt you." He said, but to no avail that didn't make me feel any better. His hand then snakes to my chest, and I was able to squeak out "No!" That didn't stop him because his hand then moved further down which made my toes scrunch up and I gasped feeling like I was drowning as he began to touch my somewhere I never wanted him to be. "Stop! No more!" I screamed. He covered my mouth quickly. "Shut up!" I cried even harder hearing that, but my wails were muffled by his hand.

Half of an hour passed after he did what he had done. He left me there as I laid in silence with dried tears on my face. I didn't know what to do. I felt like an empty shell. I slowly began to move off of the couch and to my room. As soon as I got in I locked the door. I began crying more fearing what would happen now. Would my father come back and attack me again? Would my mother be mad at me because I did what I had done with my father? I didn't know, but it just hurt so much. I needed it to end.

Opening the front door and walking in. "Hannah, I'm home!" Said Hannah's mother. She didn't get a reply. "Richard!?" She called out. "I'm in here." He said from the kitchen. She walked to the kitchen to greet Hannah's father slumped into a chair at the table with beer bottles sitting. "Richard!" She yelled. "What?!" He said and held his head as he had a migraine from drinking so much. "Why are you drinking this much, and where is Hannah?" Saying with anger and worried for her daughter. "Last I saw she was in her room. I'm sure she's playing with her dolls." Her mother sighs at such a sight and leaves her father be and heads to Hannah's room, as she reaches her closed door she grabs the handle and tries to open the door. Hannah must've locked it by accident thought her mother. She went and retrieved the hidden key and used it to open the door but at first glance upon opening the door she didn't see her in her room and at first slightly panicked. She quickly ran into her room and looked around again and when as she looked around her face then went to a dreadful white and she ran to the bathroom and vomited. After that she quickly called the police.

Hannah was pronounced dead at the scene of the crime. The death was considered homicide by self hanging, but since her father was within the home during the crime he was taken into custody and then later charged with child abuse, and rape.

During those last few hours of her life she underwent major psychological damage and even if she were to live her life would be even harder to cope with as the memories from this event would resurface and her suicide would still be inevitable.