Brolby [The Beginning]

Chapter 2

Colby's pov

It felt like someone had just ripped his heart out. He started to tremble and a few pearls of sweat appeared below his hairline.
Sam was standing right in front of Colby, staring at his cut up stomach with confusion and shock in his eyes.

"Colby.. What.."

Sam didn't have time to say another word before Colby pushed past him heading for the door. All he wanted to do right now was to lock himself in his room and never come back out. Everything he had fought so hard for to hide for so many years was now out in the open, all his shame and embarrassment was now not only for Colby's eyes to see.
Before he could reach the door he felt a firm grip around his wrist, holding him back.

"Colby? It's okay, just.. stay here and talk with me for a bit."

Colby could feel his eyes burning as the tears flooded them, still having his head turned towards the door. He was not about to cry right now, especially not in front of Sam. He couldn't show him what a sissy he really was.
As Colby's head fell towards the ground he could feel the grip around his wrist loosen, and instead felt Sam's hands on his shoulders. He had gotten between Colby and the door so he knew Sam wouldn't let this go.

"Why haven't you told me?" Sam softly asked.

Colby opened his mouth and tried to speak but no words came out. All he could to was shake his head and cover his face with his hands as he no longer could hold in the tears.

"Oh Colby, come here. It's going to be okay, I promise." Sam said as he pulled Colby into a tight hug.

Sam's pov

As he held Colby in a tight hug, letting him cry on his shoulder, Sam couldn't stop thinking about what he had just seen. He had no idea, he would never had thought that Colby would ever hurt himself. He knew that Colby's family was troubled and that he had times when he felt down, but something like this.. Why hadn't he confided in Sam? He could have helped him.
He could feel Colby shaking in his arms and his tears stain his shirt as he broke the hug.

"Do you feel a little better?" Sam asked as he flashed a warm smile.

Colby's blue eyes were red from the crying and he folded his arms trying to hide his stomach.

"Yeah.. Sorry."

He kept looking at the ground avoiding all eye contact, it was clear that he was completely embarrassed.

"Here bro, take this."

Sam pulled his sweater off and gave it to Colby, he wanted him to feel comfortable. Even though he had nothing to feel embarrassed about, that obviously wasn't as clear to Colby.
He gave Sam a quick smile as he grabbed the sweater, turning around before putting it on.
He took out another cig, lit it and sat down. Sam took this as Colby being okay to talk. It took a while, but soon enough he had started talking and told Sam everything that had happened and everything that was still happening.
He told him about his dad constantly beating him up, his mom doing nothing to stop it, his depression and his anxiety and finally his cutting.
Sam didn't understand how during their seven year friendship he hadn't noticed anything. He knew he had issues with his family, but not to the point of abuse. And his cutting.. Colby stopped taking his shirt of when they were around 17 but he said that he didn't like how he looked and Sam didn't want to pressure him about it.

"I'm sorry, Colby." Sam sighed
"Dude, what are you sorry for? You haven't done anything."
"Exactly, I didn't do anything. I should have pushed you to talk when I could clearly see that something was bothering you. But I didn't, and I truly am sorry for that, bro."

Colby got quiet but after a few seconds he shook his head and finally made eye contact with Sam.

"You have nothing to apologize for. You were and still are the only thing that keeps me going. You are a brother to me and I know that you'll always be there for me and help me no matter what. If I just had the balls to ask for help I know that you would have done anything possible to help me."

Sam smiled and put his arms around Colby's shoulders, pulling him into a manly side hug.
"Alright, lets go get some sleep so we can get this party together tomorrow. Well, later this evening I guess." Sam said as he looked at the time on his phone.
Colby gave him the first real smile he had seen in a while which made Sam feel truly happy.

Colby's pov

He laid in his bed, still wearing Sam's sweater. His eyes were drawn to the box beside his desk in which he kept all his cameras, memory cards, batteries and.. his razor blade. It was wrapped in a paper towel and shoved in an empty battery package. He wanted to take it and just throw it away, but as so many times before, he just couldn't do it. It was the only thing that made him feel in control when the whole world around him was too much to handle, and he was not ready to let that go.
A big sigh left his mouth as he took up his phone, opened Snapchat and took the second selfie of the night.

He rolled over to try to fall asleep while the conversation with Sam was on repeat in his mind.
Colby had told Sam everything.. almost. He told him about the abuse, but not the reason why. His whole family hated him because he was.. not straight, and Sam.. He couldn't lose him as well.
He knew deep down that Sam would never judge him. Hell, he even had friends that were gay, but the manipulation from his family still made it hard to believe that people would actually stay.
The exhaustion from the whole night made its appearance and soon enough Colby was fast asleep, trapped in the nightmares that he knew all too well. 

Okay.. Party and Mr. Brennen in the next chapter. Didn't want to rush the whole Sam/Colby thing.
Hope you'll like it!

💜