Okay, I’m sorry I haven’t been on for like 6 months! I have been stressed out because I as behind in math, history and Danish (like English, just my first language[ )
And, some of my private life isn’t good, my dad is starting drinking and sign, I feel like shit…
And I have had exam and shit, holy fuck
Waaaaaaaaaaaaaait, I miss 2 sides? What the fuck? This is not okay, what the fuck happened. Now I need to begin again, damn
Imma make this into a smut sooner or later, if Louis comes over his depression…?
And no, Louis don’t write diary. I don’t know why I choose not to but yeah, now I’ve been writing for some time like 3 hours (I’m in a car, yes you can kill me)
And I’m going to steal a lyric from Bring Me the Horizon (can you feel ,my heart) to Louis’ poem
And I’m sorry if there are any grammar mistakes.
Louis POV
Lately I’ve been writing sad and suicidal poems, and I... I just don’t know if I should lay one for Harry, I mean, wouldn’t be mean if I didn’t lay a note to see how unhappy I am? But then again, wouldn’t it be mean to lay a note, to hurt him like that. I didn’t know what I should do…
“I'm sorry brothers,
So sorry lover,
Forgive me father,
I love you mother”
Harry came by later, I could give it to him there and tell him not to look before he got.
Now it was just a matter of time when he came, he could be here any minute, but he was always a bit lazy and yeah, it’s Harry we’re talking about!
While I was in my own thoughts I could feel some air beside me, I got a chock, because I thought it was Harry, but it wasn’t, it was just my sister.
“What do you want Fizzy?” I said after my disappointment of thinking it was Harry
“Nothing, you seemed so happy before you figured out it was me, is someone visiting you? What’s her name? Is she prett-“Fizzy didn’t finish her sentence, we got visit.
“Hey Bo- Louis,” Harry said after seeing Fizzy was there.
“Hi Harry! Ready for studying?” I said “We study on my room,” “Sure,” Harry said while going to my room, I looked at Fizzy and she looked back at me, did she knew? What happened if she knew? Would she tell anybody?
“Louis?” this time was it Harry who disturbed me, he smiled, “is there something wrong Boo?” he tried to smile, but it seemed fake, I knew all about it
I just gave him the note and told him to read it when he got home, he nod, afterwards he hugged me, I’ve missed those hugs and it was just what I needed, a hug, from Harry.
We started to make a little out, I told him I had to go pee, I didn’t, I got a boner after making out with Harry, and I yes, I find it embarrassing. It got back down (I call him Larry ‘cause it’s me and Harry’s name together), and I walked into my room again, Harry looked at me, with tears in his eyes
“Did you read it?” I said, I just forgot how the depression felt like with Harry, without Harry I don’t know what I should do. When I’m with him my life is just complete.
“Louis… was you about to kill yourself!?” he yelled at me, I didn’t like when he yelled
“Ha-Ha-Harry, you don’t understand… you’ll never understand and I’m sorry for getting you through this but I just needed to get it out, but I wrote it before you came over, when I’m with you it’s like the world is nothing, I can be anyone I want to be and I just… Harry I don’t know what you do to me but I truly love you, and I will continue to love you the rest of my life, ‘cause you’re the reason I’m living it out now,” when I ended it I could stop crying “and please Harry, don’t yell at me, I don’t like it when you’re mad,”
I couldn’t believe it! He just stood there and stood!? I just told him I loved him and he’s just standing?! He’s making me mad now…
“Louis…?” he said quiet “I love you too, just promise me, never, never, never ever to commit suicide, you’re my world too and I don’t know what I should do without you, because I’m getting bullied too, punched and whatnot but it would never tear me down! They shouldn’t win! You can do this Louis, we can do this” Harry said while he was taking my hand looked me in my eyes before he kissed me again. He pulled away, “Louis, I’m crazy about you, please say you will not commit…” Harry said when I pulled back.
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Okay, I am sorry it is so short I just felt like I needed to update it sooner or later, but here it is
