Both Sides of You

Chapter 2

"I have a lot of what you might call creative self-loathing - I have pretty high expectations, and they seem to consistently be higher than what I'm able to accomplish."

-Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu

JaeHee's POV

"Only 49 out of 50? Do you know how low that is? How could you be so careless? I thought I raised you better than that!"

"But I was the highest in class... and it is just one mark—"

"How dare you talk back when you gotten such a low mark?! 'Just one mark'? Do you know how important one mark is? One mark can cause you to fall behind those in the elite schools. You better buck up if not I am deporting you back here, do you understand?"

"Yes, Mum."

Laying on the bed, I could not help but recalled the conversation I had with my mother. It had been almost 4 months ever since I moved into a new apartment, away from her. Instead of a call asking how I had been, how I had been eating and how was my social life, she called just because she heard about my newly attained grades.

My parents had divorced since I was a small child, allowing my mum to hold complete custody over me. But instead of showering me with love like most parents do, she kept drilling me through tuition classes, enrichment class and Olympiads. I did not have a chance to have fun in my childhood like most kids, being able to do stupid shit and laugh it over. Instead of real human friends, books were mine instead.

I knew that it is not easy being a single parent, having to raise a kid while supporting herself. I understand the reason why my mum seldom make her appearance in my childhood, leaving me under the care of my domestic helper instead. For all of my life, my mother had really high expectation of me, expecting me to be the best in everything I do.

"In life, nothing beats good grades. Only with good grades, you are powerful and influential. Friends are redundant distractions that will just pull you down. So do not, i repeat do not, ever get yourself distracted and just focus on getting good results. That is the only way for you to get my love."

But it hurts my heart to think that I could never be the perfect daughter that my mum wanted me to be. Because I am this flawed girl who just wanted her approval. I had always craved for her attention, her approval and her compliments. But I had to earn those with great effort. It was hard, almost impossible to achieve.

My life goal is to get to Seoul National University, get my degree and continue studying for a Masters and eventually a PhD. With that, I can be a doctor and enjoy the rest of life.

...At least that is what my mum told me.

Sighing, I got off the bed and head to the study table.

There is no time to dwell in self-pity. Studying is my priority.

~~~~~~~

3rd person POV

"Come onnnnnn! It will be fun, I promise!" Jimin's best friend, Taehyung, started jumping on his bed and tugging his right sleeve, causing him to look at Taehyung with furrowed eyebows.

"I really do not want to go, all I want to do is just stay at home and read webtoons"

"But we have not gone there in like forever! I'm bored and lonely. And we are turning older everyday! What if no one appreciates this fabulous face anymore? I need to go and show it off you know?"

"The winks and smirks you give in school contradicts that statement, Tae Tae. Besides, it is so loud and dark there, no one will give a damn about how you look." Jimin deadpanned, redirecting his attention to his phone.

"What about this? If you go, I'll treat you to Korean barbecue after school?" Upon that statement, Jimin stopped whatever he was doing as he looked at Taehyung, eyes lit up in anticipation.

"K-BBQ?"

Seeing him getting swayed, Taehyung laughed in amusement mentally. "Yes and the place with free flow beef."

Pretending to think about it, Jimin gave his consent to Taehyung, causing Taehyung to gave him a smug smirk.

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