16 years | l. messi

2. hopes.

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L E O

My hands ached to feel her beautiful body, my eyes ached to see how beautiful she had grown and my heart ached to be reunited with her own one after all these years.

I couldn't find her, not even a single trace of her. I wasn't sure if she was even alive anymore. I couldn't stay longer in Argentina, apart from the only good memory of Lana, the place held nothing but nightmares for me.

I decided to go back after two weeks of searching for her.

Maybe she is watching me somewhere in the world, with my jersey on her body and chanring my name at some TV screen.

As night comes around, lost hope is recovered soon with determination and optimism. I turn my gaze to the night starry sky, with still in my last day here in Argentina, and remember her words to me from 16 years ago.

"If you ever miss me, just look at the brightest star in the night sky, know that I am watching you and I am always with you."

"I promise I'll find you Lana." I tell the sky absentmindedly, mumbling incoherent words to myself in her memory. "Maybe not today but soon, I promise. I promise you, I'll find you  and I can't wait for that day to come by."
____

Coach tells us we will be flying to France in the coming days for the champions league game against PSG. Soon, we are huddled up with one or two suitcases by our side, already getting into the plane to leave for France.

A sigh escapes my lips as I take my designated seat and plug in my headphones, listening to the melodies to Adele, what a talented lady she was. Although I don't understand much that she says because of that accent, I like the beat and that's all I need to make myself at peace.

Neymar would be playing against us in the match— I don't want to play against him, he had been a dear friend and I haven't seen him in a while. I'll admit, it gets lonely without his lame jokes in the dressing room and training sessions.

My eyes shut close and I find myself slowly drifting off into slumber— all her memories plagued my brain for eternity.

"OI, LEO? GET UP, WE'RE HERE, MATE."

Marc's voice brings me to the world from my much comfortable slumber. I find myself getting up and finally heading out, being guided to our hotel and later, our rooms.

The room they gave me was very extravagant, nothing that I would've imagined of getting 16 years ago.

I don't know why I keep comparing everything to what I had 16 years ago— maybe because one never forgets where they came from.

As I had already gotten my sleep, I decided to head out into the streets of Paris, deciding to explore around. We had come to Paris after much longer than I remembered— I wanted to make the best use of my time here.

I pulled my blue hoodie over my head and walked out the hotel, passing reception and then the lobby. As the place was still a foreign one, I didn't want to walk away too much and then get lost— so I decided to stick to the places around the hotel.

The place really was beautiful, couples holding hands in the parks and the children playing— couldn't be a more beautiful sight, to me at least.

Bonjour, was the name of the cafe that I entered. My stomach was craving caffeine at this point. The waitress came over and I ordered a regular coffee with a blueberry muffin.

As I looked around the place, my eyes and my mind stopped working as I stopped on a certain someone who held my heart right in her palm— was this an illusion? Were my eyes playing a trick on me?

Even after 16 years, I could clearly distinguish her from the rest of the world. The same grey eyes and the same lips I kissed 16 years ago, my first kiss.

I walked up to her with shaky legs and trembling lips, maybe she didn't know me anymore, heck, maybe it wasn't even her, and my mind was playing games on me after all. She was looking outside the window and her shiny brunette hair was down on her shoulders.

Lord, save me.

"Lana?" I finally managed to croak. Her head snapped in my direction and her eyes widened, those beautiful grey orbs I remember looking into, 16 years ago.

It was melancholy.

"Le—" she was going to say me name just when we were interrupted with a tall man walked right up to her, he carried a sleeping figure, a baby, in his arms. Upon his arrival, as confusion settled in my mind, something took upon Lana's features— disgust? Anger? I couldn't quite tell.

Lana got up from her chair and held the small frame of the little less than toddler in her arms carefully. "I'll get him after two weeks." Was all he said and went off, without even sparing another glance at either of us.

Well, he could've at least looked at me, for God's love, I was Messi.

Silence took over us.

"You're Lana, aren't you?" I tell her, almost sure of my theory in my mind. I saw a tear slip her eye as she laid the child in the little walker next to her.

"I don't know if I am your Lana anymore, Leo." She told me, her lips trembling. "I am sorry." By now, she was literally crying right in front me— this wasn't how I thought it would go, our meeting after 16 years. She put her head in her hands and my heart swelled.

"Lana," I roll her name off my tongue, "Why are you cry—"

"You don't get it, I didn't wait for you, I— I don't know, it's just all messed up, I'm sorry but I'm not the same Lana as you left, this isn't the Lana you want, or even want to see."

"What do you mean you didn't wait for me?"I knitted my eyebrows together.

She held eye contact with me for a minute before finally speaking, "This is my son."