Foreigners of Humanity (Trolls x Reader)

「❶⓪」"Shave Me Bald and Call Me An Egg"

Ok... first things first.

All those fruit loops are complete and utter assholes.

Just how in the living hell did they mix you up with some ugly-ass-raisins-commercial-rejects?!

Like seriously! Most of them either have beer guts or are literally fucking toothpicks with witch noses.

You were going to murder them all for this.

As you made your way over the wall like a total badass, they started singing some good ol' fashion Copyright music.

It caused you to stop and scrunch up your face in disgust. This was just a disgrace to Gorillaz.

Well, you can't deny that you can't sing, but to be compared to this.... that's just cruel.

Some gasped as you walked through the town, halting their terrible singing... if you can even call it that. They began to whisper to each other, disgusting little banshees they called babies began to cry when you looked at them.

But before you could so much as get a syllable of a curse word out, some walking prunes came running towards you in guard outfits. "That's the monster! Grab her!"

Well shit.

"Ok! First of all," You began. "That's fuckin' rude as hell! And secondly," You stood your ground, watching their every move. "You're one to talk you moldy ass raisins!"

With that, you did the first thing you could think of. You started knocking people out with your fists.

And it was great!

A genuine laugh left you as you watched people fall left and right to the power of your fists of fury.

Well shave me bald and call me an egg, you're turning into Saitama with your one punch knock outs.

______

The Trolls had just found the Skating-shoe..... thing, and were running away- hold on, let me correct myself, rolling away with the locket in they're grasp when they heard a commotion going on around the corner.

When they rounded the corner, they were greeted with a very relieved sight of you going to town on the Burgens that were anywhere near you.

That's when Poppy decided it would be in their best interest to call out to you, to which everyone but Branch joined in on, he tried to get them all to shut up, but it was little use, seeing as to how you couldn't seem to hear them at all as they shouted your name ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) and zoomed by, getting farther and farther away by the second.

And then they were caught, because they are a bunch of colorful dumbasses... well, minus Branch of course, he's not very colorful.

And then they found out they wasted their time on trying to save the creepy fucker we all know and hate who goes by the name Creek the Creep.

And then every tried to strangle him and he died.

The end.

HA! Just kidding, shit's not that easy. And besides, we still have to get your ass to the castle so you can rescues your fruit loops.

So get your ass back into my story and go deal with those Burgen motherfuckers!

You were running out of things to punch, so you began to make your way up to the Castle... Plaza... thing.

Whatever, I'm no expert here obviously, so it's just a really big ass building...

"But not as big as my di- Oh shit!!" You tripped on one of the steps, causing you to take a tumble back down to the bottom, where you lay, cursing the Author for doing that to you on purpose.

"Like seriously, all I was going to say was di- WHAT THE FUCK?!" You tripped on air and smacked your chin on the stone ground, it's cold surface being welcomed to settle on your bruised chin and body. "This is such shit bro. I can literally say anything I want in this book, but not the commonly used word for a male's genitalia?! That's fucked up. You're fucked up!" You declared, standing up from the ground and looking at all the burgens who gave you strange looks like you were crazy.

"The fuck you lookin' at?!"

They all turned away, bruises clearly visible from where you had punched them all in your rampage.

Just then, you halted on one of the steps, realization smacking you hard in the face, almost sending you flying down the stairs again, but you held your ground.... all of this....

It was space filling...

The Author was buying for time and trying to get as many words in this chapter so it could at least be a over 7 pages long.

"WHAT THE FUCK?! YOU KNOW WHAT! FUCK THE SUSPENSE! FUCK THE CLIMAX!" You shouted at nothing in particular as you threw your hands in the air like you just didn't care and went up to the front door and kicked it open.

"AND FUCK ALL THE FORTH WALL!"

______________

Sorry if it wasn't as entertaining as you were wanting it to be, but what can you do?

________