All About This Kid

my heroes

To the wonderful characters that helped to shape me into who I am today, saving my life in the process, and to orangechicken/Nghi for writing one of these extraordinary ladies.

I am utterly certain that, upon my arrival into the world, I came forth from the womb singing "Be Our Guest" from Beauty and the Beast. The movie has held such a spell over me. For as long as I can remember, and even before, I have been obsessed with it. It was how my parents convinced me to use "the big girl potty." I was sat in front of the television on a portable toilet, movie on loop, Belle costume tantalizingly out of reach until I learned how to get out of pull ups. I did it simply for the dress. You could see me in my ball gown at all times. At Home Depot, Walmart, my grandparents, my backyard, anywhere I could wear that fraying yellow garment, I did. And to bed, I had a nightgown inspired by the "Belle dress," as I had so lovingly dubbed it.

I dreamed of being like Belle. It was my life goal, even as a toddler, to be as smart, elegant, and kind as she was. She was odd, and though she was ridiculed for it, she made no attempt to change. She stood up for herself, she stood up for others, and fought for what she believed in.

I have always loved princesses, Disney or otherwise. It was incredible to watch them grow from hardships they experienced. So while Belle was my role model for the entirety of my childhood, and still is, I started shaping my life after another princess. Princess Park Mai Alexandra Sparrow, protagonist of my favorite Wattpad novel, I'll Protect You, by orangechicken. Park was bold and brave and unabashedly herself. She was protector of her identity, her family, and her friends. She was bullied and smart and strong. She was exactly what I needed in middle school. I didn't have friends then; not close friends, anyway, but neither did Park, who used the alias "Alex Finch" while in school. Park got me through depression that I didn't realize that I had, by turning myself into her, chin held high, powerful gait, strong voice, I was able to hide from the fact that I was anything but strong or powerful. I had to grow up fast, family issues and failing health in the same area aging me eons past my peers, who only cared to snicker about the reproductive system and its synonyms. I did the best I could to remain innocent in the situation, but hoping against hope not to grow up and desperately wanting to fit in don't mix. You end up giving pieces of yourself away to achieve what others greedily ask of you. Park was the front I needed to give off in order to get people to see that I wasn't to be messed with, and, clearly, it worked. I have never once hit anybody in my life, and if you ask the kids I've known forever, they'll tell you that they were afraid to get on my bad side. It's comical, really, how I, under five feet at the time, was able to intimidate people who could easily do me harm. I held onto Park for a long time, I let her be my hero and my guide, but as I've grown more, I've found yet another role model, and I think she helped me in ways that I didn't know I needed, just like Park.

Anne Shirley-Cuthbert is a passionate individual. She is the protagonist in the Canadian series, Anne of Green Gables, and in the show Anne With an "E". I stumbled upon the show by chance, I couldn't sleep, and Criminal Minds isn't very appealing at three in the morning. I watched all seventeen available episodes, forty-four minutes each, without interruption. I had not felt so happy in a long time. Anne, emphasis on the 'e,' please, is exactly who I needed. As a child Belle was there to help me embrace my love of reading, and as a new teen, Park was there to help me stand up for myself. As a young adult, Anne is there to help me realize that it is okay to find pleasure in simple, childlike things. Imagination and curiosity should not be quelled, but embraced. The oddest of people have created very lovely things. Anne was able to open my eyes to the fact that life is cruel, but I don't have to be. My circumstances do not define me. I'm ashamed it took me seventeen years to come to that conclusion, but at least I've arrived at it. Anne may not be a princess by title, but by actions, she has checked all criteria. She is herself, brave and bold and strong. She recognizes what's wrong and fights for what's right. She is, as she says, "a kindred spirit." I didn't realize I needed one so desperately until I ran into her.

I have so many heroes, so many role models; mostly fictional, because I can go back and rewatch or reread. I can go back and review their exact actions, their exact responses, and reaffirm my love for them. I'm an old soul, and therefore can't really look up to anyone just above my age bracket. Everyone is so immature. I have more friends that are in their fifties than I do in their teens or twenties. I was able to grow a great deal with the help and guidance of these characters, they helped me to grow into myself; odd and absurd, larger than life, passionate and protective. I can finally say that I'm happy with me, thanks to the guidance I took from these ladies.

This was written as a personal narrative for class, I hope you enjoy learning a little more about me, and the characters who helped me get to where I am :)