Sherlock..........Who?

The Sign Of Three Part Two

FLASHBACK. John's blog entry entitled "The Bloody Guardsman" drifts across the screen for a moment, then fades to a view of Sherlock standing in the living room of 221B looking at his information wall behind the sofa. He turns to where Mary and Jenny is sitting at the dining table and John is sitting in his armchair and looking at his phone.

SHERLOCK: Need to work on your half of the church, Mary. Looking a bit thin.

MARY (smiling): Ah, orphan's lot. Friends – that's all I have. Lots of friends.

(We get a glimpse of the paperwork on the wall and realise that Sherlock is organising the hell out of the wedding. There is a list of things which need to be done, all of them ticked off, and the wall is divided into areas which are headed, "Transport," "Catering," "Rehearsal," "Wine," and probably other items too. On the table beside Mary is a cardboard 3D model of the reception venue.)

SHERLOCK: Schedule the organ music to begin at precisely 11.48.

JENNY : But the rehearsal's not for another two weeks. Just calm down.

SHERLOCK: Calm? I am calm. I'm extremely calm.

MARY: Let's get back to the reception, come on.

(He walks over to the table.)

MARY (handing him an RSVP card): John's cousin. Top table?

SHERLOCK (looking at the card): Hmm. Hates you. Can't even bear to think about you.

MARY (looking up at him): Seriously?

SHERLOCK: Second class post, cheap card ... (he sniffs it and grimaces) ... bought at a petrol station. Look at the stamp: three attempts at licking. She's obviously unconsciously retaining saliva.

MARY: Ah. (Over her shoulder to John) Let's stick her by the bogs.

JENNY: Good plan

SHERLOCK: Oh yes.

(He lifts Jenny out of the chair and sits down placing her on his lap. Mary leans closer to him.)

MARY: Who else hates me?

JENNY(giggles): Mary

(Instantly Sherlock hands her a sheet of paper. There's a long list of names on it.)

MARY: Oh great – thanks(!)

JOHN (looking at his phone): Priceless painting nicked. Looks interesting.

MARY (looking at paperwork on the table): Table four ...

JENNY : Done.

JOHN (chuckling at something on his screen): "My husband is three people."

MARY: Table five.

SHERLOCK (looking at a list): Major James Sholto. Who he?

MARY: Oh, John's old commanding officer. I don't think he's coming.

JOHN: He'll be there.

MARY: Well, he needs to RSVP, then.

JOHN (firmly): He'll be there.

MARY: Mmm ...

JOHN (reading from his phone): "My husband is three people." It's interesting. Says he has three distinct patterns of moles on his skin.

SHERLOCK (standing up placing Jenny on the chair again and speaking quick fire): Identical triplets – one in half a million births. Solved it without leaving the flat. Now, serviettes.