A Summer's Dream

Chapter 32~A New Beginning

It had been a couple days since we first started unpacking and things were coming together. When mom left for work she would make me promise to eat and rest up; which of course I didn’t do. I was surprised she hadn’t noticed how the apartment would look considerably better than when she left. But she probably didn’t want to point me out. Don’t get me wrong, I ate. I would have a sandwich once and a while and maybe a few chips. But my appetite was still at a standstill. I still felt heavy with some unseen burden. My heart would ache at night and I tried not to cry. I tried so, so hard. But it never seemed to work. I would always wake up with red puffy eyes in the morning.

Lydia would stop by every once and a while and help me clean. The cabinets, sink, counter, and the entire apartment’s floor were sparkling. But it was hard to even force a smile. For the most part I cleaned and organized. It was the one thing I could do that made me feel useful despite my condition. I heard the front door open and Lydia’s voice greet my mom.

“How is she today?” It was laced with concern. I fluffed my pillows and continued to straighten my sheets.

“She’s fine. But…Well…She’s not herself.”

“I know. It’s like she’s not even here most of the time.”

“Has she said anything?”

There was silence and I assumed she shook her head, because I hadn’t said anything. How could I? I was still seeing his brown eyes whenever I closed mine.

“Not a peep. I only came by today to drop off some stuff she left at my house.” I heard a little rattling of boxes and then my door opened. “Hey.”

I looked up to see her honey colored hair and timid smile. “Hey.” I tried smiling back but it fell too quickly to look real. My hands continued to smooth out my bedding for a moment and then I sat down on it.

“You left some stuff at my house…I assumed you’d want them back.” She dropped one of my sweaters on to my bed and handed me a couple CD’s.

“Thanks…”

We sat there a couple minutes before she broke the silence. “Em?”

“Hmm?” I was looking out the window, lost in thought.

“What happened?” My head snapped over to where she was sitting and I swallowed hard. “You can’t be like this forever. D-Did someone hurt you?” Her eyes crinkled with pain and the hope of it not being true. “They weren’t mean to you or anything, right?”

I shook my head. “I’m fine.” Lies.

“We both know that’s not true. You haven’t been yourself since you got back. Your mom and I are concerned.” I knew they were. They hardly left me to myself. Either the TV was playing and they were attempting to make me laugh or they were trying to shove food down my throat. Neither of which helped at all.

“I’ll be fine.” My eyes cast down to the design on my bedding.

“Why won’t you tell me??” I could sense her voice getting more intense.

“I said I’ll be fine.” My frustration was rising a little. Why were they so nosey? I know they meant well but I just need time. I have to forget him. It’s harder said than done.

“For gosh sakes!” I jumped at her voice. “Why can’t you just talk to me?? Why are you being like this?! You’re scaring me!”

I tried using my hands to coax her into settling down. “Lyds calm dow-“

“How can I be calm when you’re wilting away?! Right before me?! You don’t smile, you don’t laugh, you hardly even eat, what is it?! What happened??”