Nahi!!

Nahii!

ARSHI OS - NAHI!!( NO!!)

It was a normal day at the Raizada mansion- normal as in the normal crazy in that crazy household. Mamiji was busy doing her 'makeupwa 's touch upwa', making HP roam behind her with a glass of fresh avocado and bitter gourd juice. She had read in the latest edition of her favourite fashion and lifestyle magazine, "STYLEWA", that all she needed for fresh glowing young skin was that juice. Although she disliked the very taste of it, she got it prepared by HP. You know, anything to keep Mamaji in town ;)

Anjali was, as usual, in the Mandir, shedding some tears of happiness without any reason, singing,"Meri aankhon mein tu muskuraye", adorning her 'puja ki thaal' with some flowers.

Naniji was trying to make Lakshmi, her pet goat, wear some modest clothes. Payal and Akash were with their equally shy son, Piyush, teaching him how to talk. Although he was already three years old, Piyush couldn't utter anything but "Ji". Even at preschool, he would not say anything but " Ji teacher ji" and "Ji classmate ji". He was as tiring and cute but mute as his parents. Every two minutes, his eyes would be filled with tears, just like his mother.

NK was practising  spoken Hindi, using the 'Hindi shabdkosh' that Khushi had gifted him.

Arnav was typing god-knows-what relentlessly in his laptop, simultaneously barking orders for Aman on his Bluetooth. He was sitting on his recliner by the poolside because Khushi was watching "THE KAMLESH KHABRI NEWS SHOW" on their television at the highest volume of sound possible.

Suddenly, she muted the TV making Arnav wonder Itna sannata kyun hai?
( Why is there so much silence?)

"NAHI! AISA NAHI HO SAKTA!"

A scream prevailed throughout the house.
Everybody got so shocked and scared that the juice fell off HP's hand,
HP shocked!
Mamiji 's lipstick spread to her nose making her nose violet!
HP fainted on seeing her!
Lakshmi ji kicked Naniji and ran away!
Naniji shocked!
Anjali's 'puja ki thaali' fell and the lamp she had lit near the temple stopped glowing, making her yell "Kuch anarth hua hai!"
(Something wrong has happened!)
Piyush started crying again making PayAsh shyly ask each other "Kya hua?"
(What happened?)

NK 's heavy Hindi shabdkosh toppled from his palms and fell on  his foot.
"Owww!" He screamed.

Aman got scared through the phone hearing Arnav's Bluetooth and laptop screen break while Arnav growled in a low voice, "What the!"

Thinking that something might have happened to Khushi, he went inside the room in a hurry.
"What happened Khushi? Why did you scream so loudly? Are you fine? Is little baby fine?" He slowly caressed her belly. "Answer me, Khushi!"

Khushi didn't respond to him, making him panic even more. She got up slowly and took small steps. He held her lightly and helped her go downstairs. She was staring the hall with wide eyes.

" Kya hua Khushi ji/ Khushi bitiya? Are you fine?"

Everybody asked her concernedly. They were taking extra care of her ever since she got pregnant. They made her sit on the sofa and served her water. She started crying hysterically. Arnav and Payal at once sat beside her and tried to console her.

"Kya hua, Khushi? Tell us!"

"Wooh ... woooh..." She cried loudly.

"Chhotte, I think we should call the doctor. God forbid something harmful might have happened to her baby..."Anjali cried.

" No, di ...Harmful, yes but not to the baby, to someone I love even more than myself..."

This sentence made Anjali alert; she asked Arnav in a panicked voice, " Chhote! Chhote, Khushi ji loves you the most, right?"

" What the, di! Do you have any doubt, what type of a question is this? You have any doubt?" Arnav was stupefied by his sister's question.

" No, Chhotte. I mean to say Khushiji said something harmful happened to somebody she loves a lot but I don't see any trace of harm in you. "

"Yes yes Anjali bitiya is shaying correctwa. Hello hi bye bye , Arnav bitwa!"

Suddenly the thought that something might have happened in Gupta family struck Payal like lightning. She started shedding tears automatically and asked Khushi.
" Khushi, did something happen to Babuji, Amma or Bua ji?"

" No ...jiji...,"Khushi continued crying.

"Arnav bhaiya, I think I know why Khushi bhabhi is crying." HP sobbed and came forward.

" So tell fast!" said Akash.

"This issue is very depressing."

"What is very sad, HP, tell fast!" Everyone coaxed HP till he finally let out the bitter truth.

"Sugar has been priced as 200 rupees for a kg!" HP held his forehead and cried.

"So?" Arnav raised his eyebrow.

" So, I brought less sugar this time. Now how will khushi bhabhi make jilebi?
I bought only 10kgs of sugar and that gets invested in making tea for this house in a week. Ever since Arnav bhaiya has got married, he rarely goes to the office. I don't know if we have enough money to buy extra sugar anymore." HP cried.

"Shut up!" Arnav shouted on HP, hearing his weird excuse.

Hearing HP's analysis, Khushi started crying  even more and exclaimed,

"Hey devi maiyya! What sort of a test are you imposing on my life? I can't even drive away my depression by making Jalebis now? So much trouble, first Salman Khan ji and now jalebi..."

"What? What happened to Salman Khan, Khushi?" Arnav looked at her in confusion.

"Arnav ji, Kamlesh khabri ji said that my Salman ji has been jailed in Jodhpur for killing a Mrug... That also a Krishna Mrug."

"A mrug? What is that? Is it something related to lord Krishna and how can Salman khan kill a god? I thought your Gods are immortal."said a confused arnav.

" Offo! Oh Angrez Arnav ji, Krishna Mrug means black deer. My Salman Khan ji has been jailed for shooting a black buck which I am cent percent sure he might have not done! I am very sure, this time also, it must have been that rogue driver of his car who must have tried to attack the poor deer!"

"What the, Khushi!

You are crying because of this,
Khushi! Yeh ladki sach mein pagal hain! Your Kamlesh khabri sells stale news, Khushi; this was day before yesterday's news."

"What?"

"Yes, Khushi ji,"said NK.
"and there is no need to be sad because today he got bail also."

"Really, Nanhe ji? There is no need to be sad then. Is he back to Mumbai?"

"Yes, Khushi ji, and he has started shooting for his new movie too. "

"I am going to see that for sure! Arnav ji, please, please take me to Mumbai. I know he lives there in some Galaxy apartments, I want to meet him."

"Bua ji is not wrong, Khushi.
You really are a Sankadevi. I will think of taking you to Mumbai."

"Yeah, hud hud dabangg dabangg!" Khushi danced while going to her room making everyone surprised.

********
My first attempt at comedy. Please like, comment, vote etc...and tell me what was your first thought at the Salman Khan controversy. This was my first thought at that controversy.