It's 12:30 am I'm sitting in the middle of my bed, all lights off while I stare at my phone. Have I had no shame as I tell her that I hope her and her boyfriend work things out and get back together. As me and him just said I love you before ending the call. Every damn night she vents to me about him and how much she missed him and loves him. What if he doesn't want her what if she can't realize that he doesn't love her anymore. I have his 100% undivided attention, he's basically whipped. All for what? My looks, my body, my laugh, I mean it can't be my personality. Look at what I'm doing? I tell her I wish her the best when all I want is for her to disappear. I want her gone forever. I can't stand her, nobody can. She's the type of girl who brakes off relationships for the dumbest reasons. But he's the type of boy who can make me weak to my knees in seconds. I hate myself for doing this, I wish her the best then later me and him talk shit about her, laugh out asses of at her over FaceTime. I have no shame. If I had a chance to change something, everything would have stayed the same. I love seeking her look stupid, gushing about how much he loves her and how they have something special. I gently pick up my hand and while the single tear or petty that glides out of my eye. Little does that stupid bitch know I've made him feel things he's never felt, done things he's never done. Honey he's completely head over heels for me and I plan on it staying that way.
