Confidential | Zauren

Ten.

"How's your day going?" Dr. Jeff asked.

"It's going phenomenally," I answered with a grin. I started thinking back to yesterday with Lauren. "That's great."

"It sure was," I smirked.

"Pardon?"

"Is. I meant it sure is great." Dr. Jeff flipped through my file.

"How's your project going? You've got a couple weeks left." I nodded my head. I wasn't sure how I felt about that.

"Everything is going well." I was no longer tracking how long I had left. "Alright, any questions?" I shook my head.

"Then I'll see you next week," he said. I nodded and stood up. Jeremy took me to the day room where Lauren was. She was working on a word cross puzzle. I sat beside her and kissed her neck. She nudged me with a smirk.

"Up, clear the tables." Oswald was pulling chairs right from under people. I started thinking of when Dr. Jeff told me to report any malpractices. "Up!" He shouted in Benny's ear. Benny sat at that spot at that table everyday tracing circles on the table with his finger. Oswald startled him. He jumped up and ran to a corner holding his ears.

"Can't stand that guy.." I grimaced.

"Who can?" Lauren laughed still looking down at the book with a crayon in her hand.

"Alright, visitation starts now! If I call your name, take a seat." Oswald started calling out names and I wasn't paying attention until I heard my name. "Did he call you?" Lauren asked. "I believe so." I stood up and approached him. "Did you call me?" I asked.
"Take a seat or I won't let you see anyone." I sat down. Lauren looked at me with a look that said, who is it? To which I shrugged.

I had my hands resting in my head, growing impatient until I heard the seat across from glide across the carpet. The smell of perfume lingered across to me. I knew who this was. I slowly looked up. Gia sat there with a smile on her face.

"Look at that hair. You look like Aladdin, but he didn't have all that scruff. You look hot though." She reached across and pinched my cheek. My eyes were wide. I was not expecting her.

"Gia.. what-" "What am I doing here?" She asked. "I know that we left off on really shitty terms, but I've been missing you so much lately. How am I supposed to live my life knowing that you're locked up in this looney bin."

"It's not a looney bin." She looked around and swallowed hard.

"That's not the point. I miss you, Zayn. You get out soon and I think that we should go out to lunch and then cuddle all night. I'll do that little thing you like." She reached across the table and placed her hand on mine. I pulled it away. She scrunched up her forehead. "Zayn, please.."

"We broke up, Gia."

"It was a stupid fight, Zayn. We get into stupid fights all the time. When was that anything to call it quits?"

"I don't.." I shook my head. "I want to be with you." She interrupted me. She stood up and sat down beside me. She grabbed my face and planted a kiss on my lips. I didn't reciprocate. I glanced past her at Lauren. Lauren's eyes were wide. She dropped her word cross and stood up, rushing toward the exit. She spoke to a tech and they both walked out. Gia watched me, and then Lauren.

"No way.." She gasped. "You won't get back with me because you're into that psycho brunette?" She stood up.

"She's not psycho."

"Maybe you are too." She grabbed her purse. She was ready to walk away, but turned around to face me. "You know, Zayn... this is a stupid project for college. You aren't going to be in here forever. Who knows how long she will." Gia then headed for the door. I dropped my head into my hands.

I tried to go out to the bathroom, but the tech wasn't buying it. I paced back and fourth waiting for Lauren to return. I wasn't sure how long it'd been, but she walked back in rubbing at her eyes. "Lauren," I rushed over to her. I took her hands and she yanked them away. She sat down on the floor, and continued working on the puzzle.

"I can explain that, Lauren." I sat down in front of her. She didn't look up. She just grabbed the puzzle box, glanced at it and then reached for another piece. "She kissed me, okay? I didn't kiss her back. I know what it looked like, but she came here to try and get me back. I'm not interested. She stormed out seconds after you did because she realized you're the one I want." Lauren looked up, and crossed her arms over her chest.

"You swear it?" She held her pinky out toward me. I smirked and wrapped my pinky around hers, kissing it to solidify my word. "I swear it."

"She smelled really nice," Lauren said. "She's insanely gorgeous too." I laughed at that.

"You smell really nice too, and you're insanely gorgeous as well."

"I smell like off brand soap and deodorant. I miss getting all dressed up and doing my hair and makeup." She sighed. "I want to look like that again.."

"Lauren, you are phenomenal the way you are."

"Lauren." Oswald said. Lauren and I both turned and looked in his direction. He was standing there with a clipboard in his hand and a timid girl beside her. Lauren gasped and jumped to her feet. "That's my sister.. Haley!" She rushed over to her sister. They wrapped their arms around one another. They were both bawling. I watched them from where I was on the floor. Lauren was grinning and crying still.

The sister reunion lasted for a good half an hour until Haley had to go. Lauren came over to me. She was still crying. "I've missed her so much. That's my baby sister. Her friends sister dropped her off and waited outside. She said she'd been trying to visit but that my parents didn't want to because it hurts them to see me here. They're the reason that I'm still here.. We talked about so much. I wish she could stay forever." Lauren looked around. "Under better circumstances of course. I told her about you."

"Did you? All great things I hope." Lauren laughed. "Of course." She let out a longing sigh, and stared back to the table she was at with his sisters just a few minutes ago. It was now occupied by Wallace and some older woman. "I'm really glad that I have you here, Zayn. I know I've mentioned it before.. but with Jay coming and going, at least you're a new constant."

When I was back in my room. I found myself mindlessly doodling on a page I ripped from my journal. Corey walked in letting out a sigh. "I'm going to break out of here and marry Rosalina." I wasn't paying him any mind. "Did you steal that from the stationary station?" I sat up. "Uh yeah.. I needed something to do when I'd get bored in here." I lied.

"Is that Lauren?" He asked looking over my shoulder. It was. "I'm just doodling.."

"Do you want to join my plan of breaking out of here to marry Lauren? We can have a double wedding." I laughed at that. I didn't need to break out of here. I was going to be out soon enough. It was sort of unfortunate, but I was really thinking about the juicy, double cheeseburger that I was going to eat.. but I couldn't imagine leaving Lauren. I had to start making that a reality. Time was quickly dwindling down.

"You know we're going to get rec time back soon. I heard they're going to open the yard back up. It's been closed off for maintenance.. but that was long before I even came here. I'm trying to work out in a big yard.. gotta stay in great shape for Rosalina. The yoga they have us doing isn't doing much for my figure."

"You aren't doing much talking.." Corey noticed. "Are you in one of your depressed episodes?" Sure, let's go with that. Corey saluted me. "Alright, I'll just head out and catch up with you in a bit, yeah?" I nodded my head and Corey left the room.

I reached under my mattress, and pulled out my whole journal, shoving the doodle of Lauren inside of it. I then started writing,

Dear Lauren,....