unlucky love (together with me)

Dream

Bright massage his forehead, he felt little dizziness since this morning, but he had his shift today. He come earlier, hope get some medicine before his shift. He opened the doctor's room, someone look at him looked little surprised.

"aw, Bright!! It's your shift again? Hmm, I thought we meet yesterday before my shift"

Bright looked at the bed where his friend lay down with questions in his face, "Morning, Peck." Bright give him greeting and closed the door, put his bag to the locker and put on his scrubs.

"Whatever, --I love you, Bright. --You come early and I can go home faster or should I go hiking after this. I forget when the last time I do it, hmmm " Peck give his big smile. Happy. Bright just give a bitter smile as return. "--Bright"

"Hmmm?"

Peck wake up, sit in the edge of bed and looked at Bright deeply, "why you so lifeless? I'm the one who had night shift. But, you're like the one who had it!!"

Bright just give his smile as the answer.

"Don't give me that damn smile that I don't know what it mean!! --Eerrr,, wait --Noone ask me to change their shift." Peck tried to figure out, "oi, are you take it all?!? --How many shift that you take, huh!?!? Want to take a long vacation, Bright the workaholic?"

"No, I jus..." Bright lose his balance, he almost fall down if Peck didn't help him.

"Wowowowooo~ Bright! Are you OK?  You're so pale, dude!!!" Peck help Bright to sit at the bed.

"I'm OK. --Just dizzy a bit"

"Are you sick?"

"No, I'm fine, really" Bright tried to avoid this kind of conversation. He didn't like anyone tried to read him.

"You're NOT fine, man!"

"I AM FINE!" Bright bold his voice. He didn't want anyone look down at him.

"Do you think I'm blind?" Peck pull Bright's body into the mirror, "tell me what you see! TELL ME, Bright!"

Mirror tell him anything, Bright see an old man with gloomy face, dark eyes bag, grayish hair and messy facial face. who's the man standing in front of him? he can't recognize his own reflection.

"listen, people come here ask for our help and what do you think when they look at you in this awful situation. Will they belive their life with you, huh!!" Peck nagging and Bright just keep silent, "look, I never doubt you, you're one of the best doctor that I know, but when you... --sick like this I can't guarantee you focus 100% !! what if you give a wrong treatment or..."

"I KNOW" Bright yelled, "I just.. I just don't know what should I do --just working and I stop thinking about anything else." Bright put his hand on his face, so depressed, he haunted with his guilty, about Farm. He make Farm changed, he ruined Farm future.

"But, you can't make it as an excuse, Bright!" Peck get angry "we work with someone LIFE! We work between life and death. --And if you make a mistake because you want to run away from your bloody problem, --it'll  become sin that you hope you never do. --And i won't forgive you, Bright!! I swear to god I won't let you do it!!"

Bright know he did wrong, he the worse. He run away from Farm, but he dangerous their patients life. He felt more miserable. He didn't know what should he do. He tried to be OK, but, he didn't. His mind always bring the memories when Farm in his arm, when he hurting Farm and the last time he met with Farm, the new Farm. He can't shut down his mind. He tried look for other man but he can't felt it anymore. Maybe it's the end of his life. He got his karma.

Peck push Bright down to bed. Bright can't help but surprised. "W-what?" Peck face just an inch from his. Bright can felt hot breath from Peck into his face.