Loneliness and Reconciliation (Short Story; Complete)

Chapter 1

Seth looked down at the dark rushing river below the bridge he stood on and wondered how quickly he would drown. He didn't want to have to hold himself down too long. That would give him a chance to change his mind.

Would I float back up if I became unconscious? Oh yeah, it's only corpses that float. Heh. It's like nature wants us all to die.

Suddenly, warm memories rose shimmering in his mind, childhood memories in which he felt like sunshine, when the light within his heart seemed to warm the world in a soft glow, making colors more vibrant, made laughter sweet and sincere, and life worth living. He couldn't remember when he stopped feeling that way. But he hated himself for having lost that precious magic.

Hope pulled at Seth's heartstrings again, but he only dug his heels into his resolve. He hated how life wanted to perpetuate its own existence without caring about those who had to endure its suffering.

If reincarnation is real, Seth called out in his mind to the darkening sky, and if any god is listening... please don't bring me back. That's the least you could do for me.

The river's rippling melody sounded so sweet in the evening air. Traffic on the outskirts of the small city had nearly emptied from the streets, and the few cars that occasionally passed by would only think the average-sized and average-looking young man was just drinking in the scenery. The sun had set halfway, enough to shock the sky with tangerine, scarlet, and violet.

It's a beautiful night, Seth thought to himself. Couldn't ask for a better one.

It was late enough that the daytime creatures were relinquishing dominion to their nocturnal brethren. Bats chittered overhead, owls hooted from the trees, and a plethora of bird calls diminished into the quiescence of twilight. Seth couldn't decide if this harmonious, seamless interim was a reason to keep living in and of itself, or if it was the perfect time to let go of the burden he knew he could no longer carry.

No one will miss me. But..., he thought to himself, allowing his burdened heart to open for a moment. ...I suppose I will miss this.

At that moment, a kind of peace and terror gripped him, as he knew that this choice was his to make, and his alone. There was no right or wrong answer. And that made it all the more painful.

Seth stepped up onto the parapet, his eyes filling with tears. Although the concrete wall was wider than his feet were long, his footing felt unstable as vertigo pulled his balance out from under him. He swayed and cried as a light breeze swept over the river, caressing his face with serene detachment. Seconds stretched into aeons as Seth stared into the abyss of the river, simultaneously the gaping maw of a ravenous beast and the embrace of a siren unashamedly promising tranquility.

Suddenly, someone pushed Seth off the bridge, and he was too terrified to cry out.

I-I don't want to die, some part of him pleaded to whatever could hear him as he fell into the inky blackness. The sun had finally set, and no gleams of sunlight streaked the waters. There was only darkness.

I don't want to die.

***

Seth woke up with the morning sun blinding his left eye. When he raised his hand to block the light, he saw his own face staring at him beneath a vibrant peach-colored sky. Or rather, it would have been him if he had dark wavy hair, gray eyes, was nearly a foot taller than he actually was, was leanly muscled, and had the bone structure of a Greek god. Still, there was something poignantly familiar about the stranger.

"Man, you take for fucking ever to do anything, even to wake up," the man's cool, sly voice drawled lazily. "I was about to give up on your sorry ass."