My tutelar. ( R.C)

Chapter 1

" Seems like I have only counted seconds to say goodbye. But hope dies last. "

***

...It was a very cold day. Seems like I will be frozen in these incomplete and grey streets of New York forever. I was on way to university. In such kind of weather I would stay at home and sleep until 12 o'clock or even more! Yes, I am such a lazy mess!;)
After sitting on a bus, Ive started to play a song "Cometa" by CNCO. Despite of the great sadness in this song, I love it so much. It gives me so much emotion. I even want to cry after hearing this song. It has a deep meaning. I also love "Mas alla" by CNCO, because in one moment it says:
"If you let me, I can be your angel."
I don't know why, but I love this moment so much. I always wanted someone to be my angel. Someone that would protect me from every single accident. Someone that would go on every risk for me. But unfortunately I was single and only single my whole 17- years old life. Though, it's not a big number, but almost all of my university mates are on their 2nd or 3rd relationship. So when I got off the bus, I crossed the street still with my airphones. I just couldn't remove them. I know it's dangerous, but I am so addicted to this "Comets" song! I am not fed up with it, even if I listen to it all day every day. Basically all the CNCO'S songs help me to run from the reality, that I don't really love. I live with my dreams, with my unique dreams that won't become real. I think that my life is useless. I easntt given passion in my life. I actually don't know what is it. All our life consist of just birth, gindergarden, school, university, getting job, pension and death. And that's all! That all we gain from our life. Seriously, it's very unhonest. We want to build an ideal life, knowing that it will end someday. So what is the use??
Lost in thoughts, I finally reached the university. I've been studying here for 5 months and already have hated it. Soon you will understand why?
So when Ive reached the inside, I saw our popular gang. And if course its ruler - the super fancy fashionable girl Shannon. Shannon was from a rich family. And because of it she' so selfish, spoiled rotten. All her life is just luxurious. She thinks that she's the mainest girl out here and everybody must obey her or she will make a catastrophe for that human. And almost everyone dies. Except me. I don't like to be under someones patronage.
That's not in my style. I'd like to be free more and I am. Not afraid of her. I always openly say everything in her face. And because of that nobody's talking to me. And because of that we are the worst enemies. She even has dated all the handsome boys in our university. And most of them are still running after her. That's so disgusting, I mean looking at them. What can I say? They're the simple idiots! They dont have their own minds and they're obsessive over someone. Like the robots. It's not the human quality. When I saw her, Ive just tried to pass, but failed. She stood right in front of me. I glared at her.

" So what do you want? "

" Him, so you think, that you're the best one? Am I right? "

" I haven't said it yet, but OK, I think, that I am at let better than you. "

Her face became more disgustful than it was naturally.

" You, stupid, bitch! I will show you who is the best out of Here! You understand me?! At least I have many friends behind me, but you have no one and always, be, like that."

" I better have no friends than having friends, like yours- the fake friends, namely the robots. They act like they all love, but it's just acting! Don't you see that?! They're all fake with you. Why I gotta need the friends like yiu. Csuse,no one respect and love you! You gotta,be very ashamed, but insted of it you just afmire of yourself! For what??? No one knows, thought even you! "

The whole hall stood there ehile we were arguing. No one said anything during our arguiment. Of course, where they can find such great courage?!
Shannon was all covered in red. Her eyes got widen. She looked around at her " friends ".

" why are you all are staring?! Look what she has said to me! Say something! "

She was like a little child, jogging around. Ive started to giggle of her behaviour and she noticed a that.

" How could you dare!? You stupid rat!!! I WILL KILL YOU ONE DAY!!!"

" OK, so can you give me my way now? "

" OK, I will show you. Black spoil! "

I've tried to go out of here, but felt a strong hurt in my stomach. It was Brandon. Shannon's new boyfriend. After that everything seemed blurred to me. I was ready to fall , but resisted. I've yryed to he strong and I did. I've stood and came to Brandon. He was looking with his ideal frightening eyes. From his look I could say that Shannon insisted him to do that.

" You better clean your head and brain a little. "

And went out. I hate everything and everybody in this world. Just no comment.
That moment my one and only friend Trisha came to me.

" Hey Shonntelle! What's, up? "

I've just raised my shoulders, giving an apathetic look.

" Nothing, just had a small argument with a special one. "

I've decided to not tell her about that bite in stomach to not frighten her.

" Oh, don't take her seriously, or do you still? "

I looked at her with my eyes full of tears.

" Oh, Shontelle. Why? I've told you million time to not pay attention to her. She's jealous of you. Of your right personality. She already knows that nobody love and respect her. And because of it she has a complex on it. But you have a friend that really appreciate you. Not fake. Promise me not to cry for such stupid things, OK?"

I've nodded and we hugged. I love Trishelle so badly much. She's so special and always supports me in different kinds of problem. She's a real friend and a right person. Also she's an Afro American , just like me. But she has more white ancestors than me and because of it she's whiter.
After all this we went to a philosophy class.