Dans POV:
"Dan, we cant keep doing this. I think we should break up"
Those words echo in my head as the memory of Phil in tears makes a home within my mind.
I tell myself I dont need him, that I dont love him anymore but my breakdowns tell otherwise.
I've disappeared from the internet, everyone's worried but I can't find it in myself to let them know I'm still here. I see the messages, the posts, the love, but it hurts. I hurt.
Chris and Pj come over to see me almost every day, Chris even stays over sometimes. They see my heartache, my breakdowns, my pain. They know how much the break up affected me, especially when Phil told me he was going back home for awhile so we could have our space. I don't know when he'll be back, its not like we talk anymore but I miss him. How could I not? He was my best friend... my love. We knew it could end messily and everything we made would go down the drain, but we were so stupidly in love that it didn't matter until now.
When alone I feel empty and alone, dead even, but Chris and Pj they try their best to make me smile and have a laugh, I cant say they fail cause they don't. I feel happy until they leave which is when the loneliness comes back and I find myself over run by darkness. I sit in my room and just stare blankly into space, most times I cry. I cry until I no longer can or until I fall into a dreamless sleep.
Speaking of which, Chris somehow convinced me to go to Hyde Park with him and Pj where we could walk around London and maybe go for coffee, also because I haven't left the apartment in a month, the day Phil left my life. I know what you're thinking, how is he still alive? Simple, Chris and Pj were the ones making sure I was alive, bringing food and entertainment.
Anyway, happy day, happy thoughts. I can't let him win and invade my brain once again... this always happens, I start to feel okay and that the day will go according to plan but on my own I can't have a clean mind for more than 5 minutes before Phil-fucking-Lester swarms my mind and memories are remembered.
But before I leap into a sinkhole of thoughts a knock at my door pulls me up and out, and I can't thank whoever it is enough.
A smiling Chris fills my vision as I open the door and I'm immediately being brought into a warm hug by Pj who I didn't even notice was here. Hugging back a small grin falls upon my face, I love these two so much.
"Alright we can continue this later because as of right now were gonna be late for the train" Chris pipes up in the comfortable silence just as we part from each others bodies, a chorus of shit is heard numerous times from Pj and I as we rush down the stairs, me of course last as I do not cardio.
By the time we had reached the apartment complex doors we were tripping over each other and sharing loud laughs when one of us almost completely tumbled down the stairs, the cold Manchester winds shut us up straight away though as it kissed our skin, a rosy colour dusting our pale faces.
A panicked gasp erupted from Pjs mouth as he checked the time, before grumbling out "Guys we have 15 minutes before the train leaves our asses in Manchester" in which we all start panicking and start to run in the direction that leads us to the Underground where our train awaited us.
My heart was pounding against my rib cage and my lungs were burning every time I inhaled as my legs continued to carry me towards the train. My eyes avert in front of me to see Chris and Pj struggling just as much as I was. It was quite a funny sight actually, imagine 3 tall and lanky british guys who are clearly unathletic, run for a train which certainly wont be moving anytime soon.
We make it with 3 minutes to spare, sweat litters our skin as we stumble to find a seat, when accomplished we all sit down. No one speaks as we calm ourselves down from that tortuous journey.
When my breathing wasn't so erratic I comprehend what had just happened and cant help but let a smile cross my flushed face as a loud cackle arises from my throat. Within minutes all three of us are crying of laughter as the train makes way for London.
I hope today stays this way, I can deal with the negativity when Im home alone. As of right now I just want to enjoy this day with my two best friends and myself being happy.
As our laughter dies down conversation soon strikes up, Chris was doing his daily update on Luna that boy sometimes, my god.
A/N ayyyye so hell yee I'm back and for the first time in a long time I'm motivated to finish a story that I hope to be proud of. Hope you enjoyed and are ready to break for the chapters to come.
