trigger warning (might trigger some people)
have you ever felt like you had no reason to live. when you see all your friends out there having boyfriends and living their best lives, hikes you're in the back corner of your room crying yourself to sleep. then something snaps and you knew perfectly well that you had to end it all.
y/n slowly walks over to the back of her room, to where she calls the "crying corner". she sits down pushing her knees closer to her chest. she then pulls out her phone and a knife. she quickly dials the phone number that she memorized and clicked the call button without double checking the number.
"hello? who is this?" a deep masculine voice says from the other end of the phone. y/n takes a deep shaky breath before speaking.
"hi, my name is y/n l/n and i want to kill myself." y/n says softly, with a slight confidence laced through her words. the other end was silent, with some slight shuffling.
"i'm sorry, this isn't the suicide hotline." the voice replies quieter than before.
sympathy, exactly what you were dreading
"look i don't need your fake sympathy, so i'm just going to end the call. i'm so fücking pathetic and dumb. i'm sorry for waisting your ti-"
"my name is sean. sean lew," the boy says interrupting your apology/rant, "and you're not pathetic or dumb, and you don't have to kill yourself. i can help." sean says sincerely, and y/n almost believed him until she remembered the other types of "help" people offered.
"i don't need you. i don't need anybody, what i need to do is die. it'll make this world better for me, my family, and my friends!" y/n spat to the boy, he wasn't helping her, he was only getting on her last nerve.
"y/n! killing yourself will not make this world better but worse. your family will mourn everyday that goes by after your death. your friends will beat themselves up because they weren't there for you. i will never look at myself the same way if you die." sean exclaims, whispering the last sentence.
"you don't even know me. you don't even know how it feels to be worthless or have to live your life wanting to kill yourself to just end all the pain and misery!" y/n yells now frustrated with the boy. the line went silent for a bit.
"there was this girl. she was my girlfriend, very pretty. but a year into us dating she became distant, she would stop talking at times and whenever we would hang out whether alone or with friends she would decline. and i was an ässhöle of a boyfriend, I never checked up on her and when she cried i wouldn't think much of it. i legit stopped caring because she was so sad, it got annoying. and then one day at 1:00 am in the morning getting a call. it was my girlfriend's mother, and she said 'sean, kaycee killed herself. she's gone.' and after that phone call i vowed to myself that i'd be more aware and help anyone that's going through a situation like that. so please y/n, l-let me h-help you." sean is in tears by the end of his little speech. and y/n slowly puts down her knife.
"how can you help me if you don't even know me?and you don't want to know me, i have to be one of the most ugliest, most uninteresting person in the universe." y/n says softly looking at her reflection in the mirror across the room.
"honestly, y/n you seem like a very interesting person with a story to tell. and i bet you're really pretty." sean says chuckling, y/n looks down and blushes.
"so how about this. i want you to save my number and whenever you need someone to talk to whether your happy or sad just text or call me. i will literally drop everything to talk to you." sean proposes causing y/n to chuckle softly.
"ok, i will. and thanks sean for everything you said." y/n says, picking up the knife and walking it over to it's respectful position in the kitchen drawer.
"no problem y/n. well i gotta go, i have dance class. keep smiling y/n, bye."
"thanks sean, bye." y/n answers before ending the phone call. she smiles to herself and walks to her room, plopping on her bed and facing the ceiling.
maybe there is a reason to stay alive
• • • • •
a/n if your someone going through a situation like this please don't hesitate to slide into my private messages. i also wanted to apologize for killing off kaycee (it was nothing personal), lastly if you think i should make this a book please comment it. because i literally already have faceclaims. love you guys💕
word count: 835
YOU ARE READING
imagine this. boysquad
Fanfiction- 🕺🏽🍒🎬 where a fangirl gives you imagines about og boysquad
