I deal with my autism through human assistance. there are four adults that work with me at any given point. they are my friends but also teach me social skills and how to be with other people smoothly as we interact. they help me control meltdowns when they happen. when I do things like shake my hands or rock back and forth, they don't see it as weird because they know me. they help me relax. it is often that I need space. when I go to youth group at my church I often come from my home where my parents dislike having an autistic daughter. I have two older brothers who are NT and a younger one who is NT also. they don't dislike having an autistic sister. I asked them. but it is difficult. I go from a situation where my gifts are noticed but so are the autistic behaviors to a place where my main goals are to build a relationship with God and also work on social interaction. my youth pastor is one of my adults. I asked her what it is like to have an autistic student. she said that it makes her a little sad to watch me struggle with communication or sensory issues but she also loves that I have an eidetic memory and remember bible verses or lessons extremely well. I know that it is hard for others to be friends or even be around me. I have rules I've made for social interaction that may not he necessary or even correct but I feel the need to stick to them. NTs don't. rules make me feel safer and less exposed then having a conversation. small talk is something I find useless and stupid. so I built rules to do so without it being stupid. I small talk about things that matter or get it over with like pulling off a bandaid.
