I Was Your Child's Killer

Shoot Them, Baby

I'm laying in the bath tub naked. With a rubber duck. A soft lullaby like tune plays in the background. Pink fog fills the room. There's little lights lit around on candle surrounding the bath. It's relaxing.

Suddenly, the bath turns to an ocean as far as the eye can see. The rubber duck is now a tame shark swimming in circles around me but not attacking. The pink fog turns to smoke, smelling like a fire. The light from the candles are now lights from guns being fired around me. The bullets hitting innocent kids on the other side begging for mercy. I'm in the middle of it all, though I'm not the one getting hurt until a dark figure swims from below me, and then she sits on my crouch area from where I'm afloat. It's a young girl that looks about thirteen years old. It's me. Then

She looks down on me with a big wide toothless smile. Then quickly thrusts outs one of her hands to wrap around my neck. She then proceeded to choke and drown me.

I wake up in a puddle of my own sweat. Salty water rolling down my face. The mix of tears, sweat, and fear fill up the room. I grab my phone checking the time, 3:51 am.
It's still dark out.

I couldn't bare sleeping in my bed surrounded by my nightmares and sweat so I make my way over to my beanbag chair and fall into it. Slumping into the soft cushion. I pull out my phone again and go on YouTube. I search for my favorite YouTubers, some like, James Charles, dan and Phil, Zoella, Liza koshy, and Christian. The boy from school. He's made yet another rap called "Shoot them, baby"

Sounds cheesy and slightly annoying at first, but then the corus plays,

"They don't know what their saying so don't listen to them, listen to the voices in your head. Their your only friend, they've been there for you since the time you learned about the real world. So listen to them and pick up the gun, hide it in your backpack, and take it out in class. Shoot them, baby. Shoot them, baby."

Wow. I wouldn't be surprised if the FBI showed up on his doorstep. This is really dark and personal stuff. First he talks about taking his own life, and now he wants to take someone else's.

By the time I finish scrolling around on YouTube and wattpad, it's 5:36 am. My alarm usually goes off at 6:30 so at this time I should just get ready.

I take a shower, change clothes, eat, pet my hamster, and then finish up on any homework I was too tired to do last night. That's the routine for the morning, the routine I've been doing my entire life. Yet something crosses my mind. Not a voice. Not a thought. But something like a command that I can't disobey. I go downstairs to the kitchen and take a sharp knife out of the drawer. I sharpen it more. I don't know what's happening. It's like I can't stop my body.

My hand sticks out and opens a pocket in my backpack like I'm about to put the knife inside of my backpack.

Finally, I'm brought back to reality and quickly use my other hand to wack the knife out of my hand. The knife goes flying across the room and it hits the floor making a tinking sound. My hand was injured from the knife. A long clean cut from the bottom of my palm to my pinky.
Bloods drips from the wound but I clean it and disinfect it. A bandaid is too short for the cut, so I use a real bandage. You know, the ones you have to actually wrap around your entire hand. The bandage is thin thankfully, so I can still move my hand just fine.
I put the knife away and sit on the couch and go on my laptop to go on instagram.

But instead of logging on into my usual account, SukiTheSuicidalHamster. I make a new account called

"Sad_Hallie"

Weirdly, the name isn't taken. I upload my first post called
"Shoot them, baby"
The photo is a picture of my bandage wrapped hand.
I then add a single hashtag.

#KillThemForHappiness.