𝙡𝙞𝙩𝙩𝙡𝙚 𝙤𝙧𝙥𝙝𝙖𝙣 𝙣𝙤𝙧𝙢𝙖𝙣 [ the promised neverland ]

xxxv | 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘨𝘦𝘥𝘺

(y/n)'s normal day in lambda would go on like this; she'd wake up at six in the morning, just like how she did when she's still at the orphanage. she'll have her time to groom herself and eat breakfast 'til eight. she'd strictly take numbers of different intellectual tests on the next three hours, for some reason. lunch will be one of the times where (y/n) would wish time will go slow, or much better, stop. as it will lead to her least favorite time in the day: the time between noon and six in the morning.

so much for living in the human world, so much for staying under quarantine.

"play time," is how doctor smee would like to call those hours. you'd think a lot of kids would love play time. wrong, at least not in this world. (y/n) would rather skin herself alive than to go past noon.

(y/n) sighed as she completes another set of intelligence quotient test.

"you're safe in the human world, you will not find any trace of the demon's existence." to her, the lie sounded like a pretentious nonsense. she knew doctor smee is just sugarcoating everything, though she'll give him her thanks for at least trying to make her feel better. for trying in the worst way possible.

ah, yes. the beloved human world. that explains the mutating humans on the areas they pass by whenever they're moving to a new room to take some mandatory tests. she would hear screeches, wailing, and pleas. she'd hear them beg to be freed, but she wouldn't answer them,  nor would she bat an eye. some are graphic and she'd avoid lifting her vision at the scene, and some are just hard to look at.  but she'd be too deep into her thoughts to register that it wasn't a circus she's gazing at.

yes, maybe it's true- this may be the human world. but witnessing humans turn into something demonic is no different from looking at a demon.

upon  reaching her respective room, medicines, vitamins, and pills foreign to (y/n)'s knowledge are placed atop her cabinet, it replaced the lamp she liked. in different shapes and tastes, one would think all of these little bottles of chemicals are made for a small child. she doesn't know if it's safe, all she knew is she takes a lot of dosage of each one.

her room is always so clean, like someone's taking care of it whenever she's gone to do her daily routine. someone has got to be going through her belongings, if its considered hers. it's not like they'll see anything suspicious there. the only thing bothering the (h/c) haired girl is the lack of personal space.

she'd get watched, even in her sleep. there is no escape from their sight.

(y/n) sat down to her bed and faced the window where she could see the hazy silhouette of her doctor, "how's the result?" she asked whilst  dangling her feet.

"you passed, but you didn't to write your solutions. it's on the direction, please follow it next time," doctor smee flipped through the papers on the wooden notepad holder, not giving the (h/c) haired girl a single glance, "and you wrote the wrong date in every pages," he continued, placing the said notepad down the cold metal table.

"you wrote the date yesterday," doctor smee finished as he lifts his glasses up the bridge of his nose,  the light from (y/n)'s room obscuring his eyes to the girl's view.

"sorry," stated apologetically, clapping her hands together whilst she closes her eyes with a small smile on her face.

doctor smee nodded before speaking once again, his voice much lower than earlier, "be ready for the subsequent physical test. we will take the chip off your heart." he sat on the metal chair then proceeds to write something down to his notepad, (y/n) took note of the appearance of the pen he's using.

emma.

"are you really going to take it out?" (y/n) folds the hem of her sleeves, raising it to her elbows. she started to feel insecure about how her body looks like, she realized she didn't really think about this until the chip is mentioned. she's not scared about the surgery, she's scared someone's going to see it; the scars from grandma's anger.

she remembered isabella's last words to her before she passes out in her cell on the day she was moved to lambda-

"do not dispose her. i had an agreement with peter ratri that lambda will take care of sarah soon."

(y/n) felt her body shiver from the image of her hideous torso. she clutched her arms as if she could feel the pain on every whip grandma makes inside her mind. she grimaced at the thought of getting her hands on grandma, her intent was of someone evil. she couldn't stop thinking about the things she want to do of the older woman's body-

"-(y/n), are you okay?"

oh. almost like she just woke up from a nightmare, (y/n) shot her head up to look at the person calling her attention, "yes, doctor."

doctor smee places both of his hands on  the edge of the table, leaning forward to the glass separating him  from the (h/c) haired girl. his lab coat draped forward and his glasses slid a bit low from his nose, "(y/n), you don't... look like the person grandma told us about," he stated as he clicks a button from the pad they  use to operate the girl's room.

"isabella?" (y/n) asked monotonously.

the man leaned back to his chair, seemingly surprised that the girl knows who she is, "how?" he asked, assuming (y/n) knows what he's talking about.

"she was the one who hid me in the prison," (y/n) remembers the times where isabella would use the trainees to communicate with the her, "she kept me sane." though, it still saddens (y/n) that isabella was forbidden to interact with her.

doctor smee nodded. seconds after, the smell of a freshly cooked steak and vegetable soup lingered around the room. (y/n)'s lunch was ready to be delivered inside her room. the small drawer to carry (y/n)'s meal was clicked open and her utensils was automatically dropped inside. the woman transporting the meal didn't seem to care about the two's conversation as she quickly made her way to the next room.

"take your time to eat your lunch, i'll be checking on 22194," he stated as he profusely stood up from  his seat,  taking the notepad with him  in the process.

"wait-" (y/n) ignored the man's statement as she stares at the food on the drawer. she doesn't have the appetite to eat her meal.

"mister smee, is there something wrong with me?" the girl's voice was small and trembling. she rubbed her arms whilst she lowers her vision down to the floor.

doctor smee didn't answer, instead he shook his head sideways as he flips his notepad back to (y/n)'s test profile, "(y/n), do you know what you're fighting for?" he replies, like he didn't know how to give (y/n) a proper answer to her question.

smee checked the first symptom under (y/n)'s name for their experiment all the while.

(y/n) clutched the sides of her head in horror, she closed her eyes and grinds her teeth in repentance. something is nailing her skull, someone is destroying her. she felt like someone is tearing it open, and slowly taking parts of her, a memory that makes her who she is.

what am i losing? who am i losing? she stares at her reflection in the one way mirror. have i changed?

no. the girl in the mirror whispers - no.  

then why does she feel like she isn't herself? she felt like she's looking at someone else. for a moment, she thought she was talking to someone not her.

am i... missing something?

"i don't... remember." she didn't feel empty; she felt incomplete.

what a tragedy. the girl is losing herself, and she's not aware of it.

"it's okay, (y/n). i'm here."

the dark hues of (y/n)'s (s/c) skin under her tired eyes was imminent as she lifts her gaze to the man in front of her. she chuckled dryly while she buries her face in the palms of her hand, sighing like there's no tomorrow. in her mind, the voices of the people who told her the same exact words echoed through her mind, much like a song that she once loved and now hated.

those words are beautiful, but it doesn't mean anything to her anymore.

"thank you, mister smee. i appreciate the concern."

she doesn't.

× × ×

a/n: sorry for the slowburn. i need to build a lot of tension cuz we're about to enter a new arc, the (n/n) arc.