suicidal boy | kth ff

1

y/n's journal

entry 1, 1/1/18

dear journal,

it's exactly 12 am and it's new year now. everyone is celebrated with drinks, with their lovers, and having fun in parties, but not me. i wish i could join them, and pop open a bottle. but i've never experienced such a thing as i'm a patient in the hospital.

i'm waiting to be released, but i feel like it'll be until i'll grow old and wrinkly. then, i get to close my eyes and go back to the hospital once more. i'm tired of waiting. tired of waiting for parents to let me go. tired of waiting for something great and exciting to happen. but the only exciting thing here is when we get to roam the hospital and go into the different, pitch black rooms once in a while. 

the hospital is boring, and you have to see the same nurses every single day, for a shot or to take pills. but, i don't need pills. pills only make me feel stupid, and make me lose my memories once in a while. it makes me sleepy, and makes me feel like i just want to fall down and sleep, right where i am.

i was hoping for today to be exciting, but it isn't. i'm sleepy and it's past my bedtime and i'm trying my best to write in the dark, as the lights are off, but the hallway lights are always on. but there isn't much light. oh well, i'm getting dizzy now. goodnight.