the words of my beating heart

Maybe...

I looked up at Brandon and said maybe.

He looked at me with hurt and sad in his eyes. Then said "I would do anything to hurt someone that hurt you."

"There's many then." I said

"What do you mean there's many? Like more people that did this to you?" Brandon asked

"Yes, including me." I said looking down

"What's that mean?"

"It means I hurt myself too, I cut okay. Is that what you wanted to hear. Just adding more couldn't hurt since I look like death."

"That is not true, you are beautiful in every way."

"That's what you think," I said looking up at him "Until you see all of my scars."

"Then show me." He said looking at me.

I stood up took off my shirt so I was in a cami. Then I took off my jeans so I was only in my underwear.

"Ya see." I said looking at my scars and him.

Brandon just sat there and stared at my thighs and my wrist. I stood there for a few more seconds then put back on my clothes. I started to have tears in my eyes, I don't know why, but I think it is because I like him. 

"Why?" Is all he said

"I didn't like my life. My mom died when I was 12. My dad would abuse me. His friends would come over and hurt me. They use to video tape me call me mean names, and would hurt me. I would always sit in my closet where they couldn't find me. I was so scared people say I shouldn't be scared anymore but I am, what if he finds me. I wouldn't eat for weeks because David would make me starve and he didn't care. Every single day I live in regret, because David may I note my father would rape me, he would abuse me, and he also blamed my mothers death on me. So I started to believe them, so I did it to myself. Now you tell me what you would do, because everyone says I shouldn't have cut, what was I suppose to do when I was trapped?" I was crying by now and Brandon had tears in his eyes.

"I am so sorry Teagan. I didn't mean it in a rude way or anything, its just you are beautiful with all of your flaws. I don't care about your past or what you have done all I care about is how you are now."

"Thanks but Brandon don't feel sorry its already done."

"I will be sorry Teagan you wanna know why, because I like you. I have liked you from day one. Teagan your perfect."

"Brandon I like you too, but I am not perfect."

"You are everything but negatives," Brandon walked up to me and wrapped his arms around my waist. "If you were negatives I want to be your negative."