Corruption [Soldier76 x Reader]

[ t e n ]

a/n: once again, this chapter contains mentions of suicide, self harm, and abuse.

[Reader's Point Of View]
I pulled backward, locking eyes with Jack. His eyes clouded with a hint of pain as another tear escaped his eye. He gently brushed his thumb across my cheek, back and forth multiple times as he continued to cry. I sat still, scared of ruining this moment.
He was the first to break the silence, his voice dry as he spoke,"Why..?"
I shook my head, not having a clear answer to his question. I didn't know what to say, how could I? It's not as if I could describe all the restless nights I'm put through. It's not like I could tell him how I felt that every living moment I experienced felt like a burden.
He seemed to collapse onto me, throwing his arms around me as he leaned over my shoulder. His grip tightened as I began to embrace him. It was like if he let go, I would be gone forever. I would float away. His warmth spread through me as he continued embracing me.
He spoke again, his voice more dry this time,"I can't lose you."
I gently shook my head, taking my time to pick out the words I would use.
•••
Flashback
•••
I lashed out as tears flooded my eyes, due to the fact that my wrists were tied up. My throat burned as I attempted to scream, only in vain. My mouth was taped shut, the sticky material restricting me from making any noise. My thighs retained dark purple bruises, the flesh underneath them sensitive and sore. He smacked me again for trying to scream, my cheek stinging worse than it had the last time. I wondered if it had bruised, trying to think about it to get my mind off of him. Though I couldn't, as his knuckles came in contact with my cheek bone. I screamed out again, my eyes pouring an ocean of liquid. Why was he doing this to me? What had I done this time?
It's as if he could read my mind," I saw you fucking flirting with Commander Morrison. Are you fucking stupid?"
He lashed out again, his knuckles making harsh contact with my nose. I sat silently, continuing to sob as he used me. How had I flirted with Commander Morrison? I had smiled and waved at him, was that it? He's right, maybe I was. That wasn't okay of me.
"I can't fucking believe you!" He spit in my face as I squinted my eyes shut," I need to go cool down before I hurt you. If you're not exactly where you are now when I come back, I'm beating your ass." He simply stated, as if it were a normal thing to say.
For him, it was.
It was many nights that he'd say this. He would go out, hook up with another girl, then come back to my room and drunkenly hit me. And I was to stay here all night, with nothing to do rather than contemplate whether this life was worth living or not. Was it really worth it, to stay alive only to suffer? Sure, i'm apart of Overwatch, but what else have I got?
I come back to my room every night to be treated the same way, beaten and tortured, like I'm a doll able to be played with. It really isn't worth it, is it? I'm sure Jamison and Mako won't miss me. They're about the only people that would notice.
I looked behind me, my eyes stinging as they came in contact with the light from the lamp I was tied to. I felt a small tear fall down the crease of my eye, stinging my cut cheek as it slowly cascaded down the side of my face. I tugged my wrists forward, only resulting in the rope that bound them tightening. The pain didn't bother me anymore, I'm not sure why. Had I become immune to it? No, I was too focused on something else.
How to leave.
I then see a flash of colors, followed by my screaming face as the lamp collapsed onto me.
More flashes, then I see glass shards surrounding my body. I could have ended it right there, at that moment. Why had I kept going?
••
End of Flashback
••
I spoke softly, quietly,"Y-you won't. I promise."
I often make promises that I can't keep, yet I feel like this one is possible. Jack was so inviting, he was someone to look up to. Someone I can come to whenever I need assistance. Hell, who am I kidding? I'd had a small portion of feelings for Jack ever since he introduced me to the team. Yet I never did admit it to myself, because I told myself that was inappropriate, so instead, I found someone else. Someone else that I thought loved me, only he didn't. I was his play toy, nothing more. He didn't love me. Never will he get the chance to hurt me again, thanks to Jack. I owe my life to Jack, quite frankly.
We had sat in an embrace for what seemed like hours, until he gently pulled me down onto the bed beside him. I gazed at him as he ran his thumbs under my eyes, I assumed it was to wipe off my makeup I had cried off. He pulled the blankets over me, then wrapped his arms around me once again. I didn't object, I instead moved closer to him, seemingly craving his warmth. I sleepily stared into his eyes, it was as if I could swim in his ocean eyes. My eyes forced themselves shut as I grew tired, my body warm due to Jack's heat.
A warm feeling spread through my chest, a heavy feeling erupting deep within me. Was it right to feel like this? Or was I just a liability to Jack? Did he really care about me, or am I just another Overwatch soldier?
I mentally slapped myself, trying my hardest not to deteriorate the thoughts floating through my head. Of course Jack cared about me, right? I'm laying in his bed, still alive somehow, with his arms clutching around me.
I can't help but wonder if he actually cares about me or not.