The Battle Based on Love

Chapter 6 - So Maybe I'm Not Okay

**Carlos' POV**

It's been twenty four hour since I woke up. It's now Monday at noon. I'm missing school. I'm in a lot of pain. But worst of all I haven't seen Jay since he walked out. And all I can think is:

I LOST HIM

How could this have happened? He is my everything. The reason I'm still alive. The reason I keep fighting. I can't imagine life without him, but he's gone and he's probably never coming back.

As I continued to tell myself that he is gone my vision started to blur. Be fore I knew it I was crying so hard my body ached from the sobs that escaped me. And no matter how hard I tried I could not get them to stop.

Thankfully everyone is in school today, that way I could be alone. They would be mad at me if they could read my thoughts right now. But I have one question, for someone I will never be able to ask, does this mean Zar wins? Has all my fighting gone to waste? I can answer that last one. No it hasn't because I know that the more I suffered the less Jay had to and that's all that matters. I can die happy now, because...

Although I lost him, he is safe

and that's all I ever wanted. Zar can't hurt him in Auradon. Zar can't hurt anyone in Auradon.

My mixed emotions were tiring me out and before I knew it I was passed out.

~~~Nightmare~~~

Where am I?

I try to walk forward but I trip on something. I look down and suddenly there is slight light. I am surrounded...

Surrounded... by... my friends?

but... no... they are dead?

"NO!" I scream and suddenly I see a 'Z' burned into each one of them.

"NO... please... no" I whisper "it should have been me..."

Suddenly it's pitch black again. And a voice shouts at me repeatedly 

"THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT... ALL YOUR FAULT"

"NO... NO... NO!!" I scream

"I'M SORRY!!!" I cry

~~~End of Nightmare~~~

I woke with a jolt and sat straight up.

"Carlos?" a voice said from my side "are you ok? I heard you screaming but I couldn't wake you" That's when I recognized the voice. Tears were pouring down my cheeks as I am brought to reality out of my nightmare.

"Jay?" I asked through raged breaths "you came back?" Jay moved to sit next to me on the bed.

"Of course, Carlos you are my best friend. Look I'm sorry I ran out like I did but hearing about the pain you have been through hurt.  Now tell me are you okay? what was your dream about?" Jay asked worry quickly filling his features.

Instantly the images of my friends dead filled my mind. I let a single tear slip before I lunged into Jay's arms. Although my body still really hurts when anything touches it I needed a hug.

"Carlos... I don't want to hurt you" I knew this was how he felt before he even said it. Jay sat like a wall terrified to make a move.

"Please" I said my voice cracking at the end due to being on the verge of more tears. Jay sighed and wrapped his arms around me. He pulled me into his lap and held me as close as he could. I felt safe. I didn't need a hug, I needed Jay but I could never tell him that.

"Carlos" I was broken out of my thoughts by the soothing sound of Jay's voice. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm okay" I say but in reality I'm not; everything hurts, I feel like I might be loosing Jay, and I don't think we have seen the last of Zar. So maybe I'm not okay, but when Jay pulled me in even closer and rocked me slightly to comfort me, because he can tell that I lied. I knew somewhere in my heart that maybe one day I will be okay, and it's okay that it's not today.

Author's note: Sorry for the late post unfortunately college got in the way. Also sorry this chapter was shorter than the others I promise next week's will be longer. Anyways what did you guys think? Let me know in the comments.