Hi everyone! I'm so sorry for not updating, I did say that I may not be able to update in the future, but that's still not okay! Well... no one was waiting for an update, so this is for myself!
This month is may! I almost cried when I went to the hospital and they gave me a doctors note for school which read: "please excuse sawako's absence on 050118 and 050218" I was like what? May? I asked my mom and it turns out this month really is may! And may = final exams! it determines if you go to the next grade level or not! the EOGs!
See, I already know I'm getting a 5 on the reading, I guarantee it, not even a 4~ For science, I'll get a 4, maybe even a 3, but math? I'M DOOMED! it's a 2 or a 1 for me, that's sure!
and that's a big no! Because this is my last year of middle school, and I can't possible graduate with a lousy 1 ! you may be thinking "jeez.. just study and you'll do well"
But thats almost impossible! Let me tell you a little story!
6th grade= I had a horrible math teacher. Tried to teach but knew nothing
7th grade= revolting perv teacher, even claimed himself he can't teach!
8th grade (now)= I had the same math teacher that I had for 6th grade, and he was even worse this year! absolutely stupid and hated me for no reason... he would lecture us about useless craps all day, get to the point old man! then I switched schools verrry last minute and this new math teacher was a wreck, and her class was even more a wreck! she would sit in her chair doing nothing while the class was snapchatting up a whole party! she tried, she really did I guess, but she didn't know much and didn't care for teaching anymore because of my class!
so you see? I can't possible do well! I've missed all 3 VERY crucial years of mathematics in middle school, which is absolutely necessary for highschool, AND college. I have 1 month to study, and I plan to study till I drop dead, day and night! only focusing on the subject of the wicked west... math! I PROMISE that I'll study everyday! I'm abandoning social media, reading manga, watching vids (not like I even can), and wasting time!
I'll study, listen to subliminals, and pray for my success! See, there's a super-duper important holiday happening from may to june, for worship, so I'll use this time to study, worship, and pray to God for success! I'll try to go praying with my family and I'll force them and their friends to pray for me... T_;; I just hope God can help me! he definitely will of course!
and if I fail, I fail, right? Not like this will matter when I'm 6 feet underground or in my after life, right??!
Oh who am I kidding, I definitely need to pass ALL of my final exams!! Forget about passing, I need to get at least a 4 or a 5! and this time I'll work hard!
Oh and BTW, the reason I can't watch any videos is because my stupid laptop is being stupid and not letting me view or listen to ANY video or audio files! not even youtube or anything! soo,, I can't listen to subliminals to help me ;0; not on laptop anyway, maybe I'll use my sister's tablet or my other sister's phone // .. yeah! I still have hope!
(jk laptop, I love you sooo much, please don't break!)
anyway, studying sawako made a studying journal and you should totally view her studying journey which she updates everyday which may also help you study and inspire you to continue your studying!! (woah, what a mouth full xD)
also I'm thinking about creating a diary.. but then again won't that distract me from studying? If I absolutely need to create one, I will!
ALSOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OMG
THIS MONTH IS MAY
WHICH MEANS NEXT MONTH IS JUNE
WHICH MEANS ITS JUNE 18
WHICH MEANS I HAVE TO VISIT MY FAMILY OVERSEAS
WHICH MEANS THEY HAVEN'T SEEN ME IN 7/8 YEARS
WHICH MEANS IM FAT
WHICH MEANS I DEFINITELY CANT GO THERE WHEN IM FAT!!!
I have so many worries, I want to be super skinny... like 100-92lbs.. I hope I can do it, Im following a very strict diet which helps you loose 20 lbs in 10 days!
and it's 52 (well techinically 51) days until june 18!
so that means.. I CAN LOOSE 1020 POUNDS?? Ok, that's too much, but still, that means I'm capable of loosing weight and if I mess up I can try again! even if I don't wanna mess up its inevitable ;;><
studying and loosing weight at the same time! I can do it, fighting!
MAY 30
MAY 31
JUN 1
^exams dates^
