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I stood by my bridge. At least, that’s what I call it. I rarely see anyone else on this bridge at night. I yawned as I took another sip of my coffee. I knew it was worthless to try and sleep at home at nights so I stick to walking around and enjoying the quiet. I looked over the side and see the water clashing against the rocks. I calmly took a step nearer and held my breath. There were many times I attempted suicide, but each and every time someone was there to either stop me or save me, and I was getting sick of it.

I was thinking about how maybe this time I could make it without anyone seeing when I heard a voice. Not paying attention, I thought about my chances that the waves would carry me under and out of view. I sighed, I hated to admit it but the chances weren’t great. I only ever tried to kill myself this way because I didn’t deserve any better. My two biggest fears, water and falling (it’s falling, not heights. I can take how high I am in a plane, but free falling out before I use a parachute is completely different than just looking down.), both come to play when I jump off and I don’t deserve any less than being scared before I die.

I sighed and looked at the fierce waves until I heard the voice again, only much closer. I step back from the edge before turning and walking down the road until I reach my apartment building. As I lay down on my single bed in my empty apartment, I think about how great it would be to have a normal life again.

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⏰ Last updated: Jul 12, 2012 ⏰

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