Meant to Crash | ✓

Chapter Twenty

Sebastian weighted the pending question I asked him about his parents, joining his brows to form a quizzical expression in silence. I had dug too deep, entering a personal domain I've never gotten access to before. I was only his assistant; my position had limitations. There must be some ethical rules at Lockhart Inc I was breaking now, prying into his life with my nosiness. 

      Then again, why should I care? My questions weren't that harmful. If I gave a damn about being ethical with my boss, I wouldn't have sucked his face inside of a hotel room, practically begging for him to do more to me. I know for a fact making out with him had to have crossed multiple lines.

      Sebastian sighed. Dragging his thumb along the wooden railing, he stalled to answer me, finding interest in the smallest detailing of his beach house instead. He gazed at as if the task of brushing on the small film of dust that had coated the top layer required his full attention and that his interest toward the railing could not be wavered. 

      "Hey Sebastian," I whispered, allowing my hand to meet his shoulder. I tightened my fingers from around his shoulder. "Forget it."

      "No, don't say 'forget it.' I want to tell you," he insisted, rushing his hand to touch mine. A smile broke through. His long dark lashes lowered slowly. "I can explain more, come inside first."

      I obligated, my mind spinning in anticipation. I didn't think he would crack this easy. He was letting me in to his world for the first time, breaking down the walls he had built. 

     With the lights off, the room smelled like mildew. When was the last time someone came in here, cleaned it up, and wiped off the dust on the counters? I asked myself, bringing a hand down on a solid figure ahead of me. 

      Dust circled the pad of my finger. Like I expected.

     "Who owns this place?"

     "I do."

     "One of your properties I'm not aware of."

     "There's many that aren't on your radar." 

      He swept a strand of hair out of my face, seeing me more clearly in the dark than I could see him. A sigh slipped out between my parted lips, longing the way he touched the small corners of my cheek like he had done it a million times before. He caressed my skin in such a way that made my heart flutter on to the surface, beating breathlessly at each movement of his fingertips. 

     "You smell heavenly tonight."

      "You said you'd tell me more once we were inside," I said, inclined to keep the dialogue going and not make a mistake like I did in New York. My cheeks went hot, recalling our steamy moment in the hotel. I didn't want a repeat of that. I had better control of myself...or at least I was praying that I did. I had to keep things professional - for the both of us, as it seems. 

        "You always have too many questions."

        "You never answer enough."

        "Maybe I'm enjoying the air of mystery far too much."

        "I would argue that you are the most mysterious man San Fran could ask for."

         "Debatable." He twisted his lips. That much I could make out, seeing him creep in oh so very closely to me. If I extended my tongue just enough, then maybe I could swipe the tip of it on his nose. 

        "Why did you disappear all those years and end your engagement to Connie?"

         His face retracted, inching away from me with his touch. It felt like an iceberg had wedge itself between us. You could see, actually see in real time, the adoration drain out of his pupils like a needle meeting a vein, draining out the blood with a single injection. 

         "What? Have you turned into one of those gossip sites?" 

         He was on the other side of the room already. How did he walk away so fast? I was beginning to think I really was in the presence of a vampire. No jokes this time.

        "I want to know more about the first half of my question more so than the second. Don't take offense to my curiosity." I sidestepped a couch, but ended up stubbing my toe on the coffee table. "Fuck, can you turn on a light in here? It's pitch black."

       "I see just fine."

        "Well sorry, Mr. Freak of Nature, but it's dark in here and I can't..." I felt around the table I had rammed my big toe in, feeling for a light. 

       Warm, inviting light glossed the living room and polished the hardwood floor in a lovely shade of orange. A sigh of relief washed over me like a cold wind, at ease with some sight on my side. Seb was standing to the window, sticking a hand into his pocket and retrieving a cigarette.

      "I didn't know you smoked."

      "I smoke a limited amount of five cigs a year."

      "So you're a crisis smoker? Picking special days to smoke?"

       He cracked a smile with the cancer stick hanging out his mouth. "You could call it that. You know, I consider you a crisis kind of girl. This is a once in a month type of conversation."

      I snatched the cig out of his mouth, setting it on the window seal. "You're not going to smoke just to avoid these questions, Mr. Lockhart."

      "Ooh, why so formal?"

      "We stopped being friendly and rushed right back to professionalism when you decided I couldn't ask one personal question."

       "Ask anything you want...except for Connie."

       "Then you can't possibly be able to tell me why you left - "

       "Connie had a miscarriage," he informed, picking up the cigarette. "She...she was not the same afterwards - granted I didn't expect her to be the same person after such a life-altering event. But she was...distant, cold, and hardly the same girl I first proposed to. Other things were calling me out of the city, though." 

        "You don't have to finish what you started." I pressed my fingers into his arm, racing them up to his cheek. He had said a lot already and I was digging in so deep to his last serious relationship. Did I have a right to dig even deeper?

       "I thought she was the end all of all relationships." He grabbed his lighter, but no motivation seemed to power him to meet the flame to the end of his cig. From the looks of it, he was about to cry.

     I had to do something. 

     And that something happened to be meeting my lips, ever so softly, to his. 

    

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a/n: sorry for taking forever on this update. 

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