Safety In Darkness

The Tree

The tree... the tree... where I lost so much... where my nightly pain started... my mother's hanging tree...

She was sad, that's all I remember about her death anyway. All I can remember is her tears staining her dress as clung to her knees. The night it happened and can never remove it from my mind.

She didn't always use to be like that you know... actually before she became a shadow she was an angel. Bright, caring, loving, always smiling; as if she never felt any pain and knew no other emotion. We would play in the park, run on the beach, read by the fire, and father didn't need to drown his sorrows away... But that was before...

Before the accident, before her sight was taken away, before she felt useless and most certainly before her never drying face with eyes filled with tears she couldn't see. Only now can I truly see her suffering... now that she's gone...

Now I am just like her, a shadow. Confined to the background, unnoticed by all and unable to come into the light. Just my father's punching bag, blaming me for what he lost, for his mistake.

The memories haunt me. The shadows clung to me attempting to drag me to Hell. If only she was here. I need her. I can't deal with the pain every night from my mind and his words, mending myself again and again only for it to happen the next day so no one will see. Though it is unlikely they would care if they did. I can't continue anyone but that doesn't matter now. I will soon be with my mother...