Starlight [Attack on Titan Fanfiction: Levi x OC]

Chapter 6: Show Me

Erwin Smith is a beguiling man. But perhaps, beguiling is not the correct word to describe him. He is frank with his statements, and everything that he says appears to hold truth to it. Still, I feel deceived in some way. But perhaps, deceived is not the correct word to describe my conflicted emotions, either. He has yet to do such a thing.

Commander, what is your goal?

A pair of stagnant blue eyes suddenly cut into my thoughts and stare right into me, the rest of his face fading into view soon after: the long, pointed nose, the chiseled jawline, and the staple, slicked-back strands of blond hair. I would not be surprised if he could hear my thoughts right now. He really is an unpredictable man.

We are on your side.

Up until now, somebody has had yet to side with the citizens of the underground. And maybe that is why I feel so reluctant to accept his proposal. The wheels that have spun in the same recurring rotations my entire life have finally decided to take a sharp, fatal turn, and it goes to show that I am not prepared for it. Erwin's intentions are unclear to me at this moment; I am uninformed as to whether they are to benefit only himself or if they are to benefit us undergrounders as well.

Either way, I am going to have to accept this proposal of his. My alternatives are very limited to begin with. As for the remaining undergrounders, a select few felt that their chances of survival when confronting the military police or by going back to the underground would outweigh that of joining the Survey Corps legion. The elder, along with the mother and her injured son, are the ones who decided to do so. The rest, including the teenage boy, the two grown men, and the young woman, were more inclined to partake in the commander's odd proposal as well. But just like myself, they did not have much of a choice in that, either.

This path that we have decided to follow has only two outcomes to it: we will live, or we will die. And for the most part, we are still oblivious on what being a part of the Survey Corps actually entails.

All I ask of you in return is to dedicate your hearts to mankind.

So what exactly does dedicating one's heart to mankind imply?

Rumors will always be rumors, but I do not think that we will realize the true extent of our acceptances to be soldiers in the Survey Corps until we set foot onto the territory outside of the walls that consists of these so-called expeditions to fight against the Titans. To me, they are still merely imaginary creatures that Anita and I fought to be in our make-believe games of Titan versus Citizen. I do not even have the slightest idea as to what they are really like when it comes to their physical attributes. I can only guess from here what dangers reality has yet to exploit me to.

Realizing that memories involving Anita had filled my mind, a wave of nausea immediately washes over me. The rations of soup and crackers that I was once yearning to consume now remain untouched on the wooden table in front of me. Tiny ripples fan out from the center of the glass bowl as the table is carelessly shaken side to side by the individuals that sit adjacent to myself as they consume their own share of food. I focus my attention on these waves to prevent myself from regurgitating chicken, carrots, and peas.

But the soothing ripples are quickly disturbed by a heavy force smacking against the table. I look up from my spot to see a woman soldier dressed in the Survey Corps uniform glaring at one of the other undergrounders. I believe his name is Eli; he is the young teenage boy who has kept relatively quiet for the duration of our time within these headquarters. The woman sneers at him with gritted teeth and seethes, "Watch where you're going next time, you pathetic bastard." It appears that Eli had accidentally bumped into her arm, which in turn caused her to spill an ounce or two of her rations on the paneled floor.