Bad Days

Aching Scars

Today wasn't a good day. After everything that's happened, it was only natural to have bad days. Where the deaths of friends and family weigh you down, or where tiny details send you reeling into a panic attack, bringing up traumatic events that have since past. And then there are days when your own body is wearing you down. Days that normal healthy people never experience.

Despite everything that was wrong, there was at least one thing that was right. Tony glanced up from his work to glance at Peter, watching him test and try different formulas for his webbing. Peter felt him staring and looked up. Tony quickly looked away, fiddling with the screen of his tablet. Peter wasn't sure if he should speak, but Tony hadn't really been acting like himself all day. He'd talk quietly and in short sentences, darting eyes over towards Peter before looking away. Tony hadn't even made a bad joke or teased him ever since he had arrived, and to top it off he kept shifting awkwardly and would frantically slap and scratch at his chest at seemingly random times. So against his better judgement, he asked the question that had been burning in his mind ever since he first got there. "Mr. Stark, are you okay?"

Tony stopped working and let out a deep sigh, running a hand over his tired face. "And be truthful. You don't let me lie when you ask that question, so you can't either." Damn, that kid was smart.

"Just got a lot on my mind, and my scar's giving me hell today." It was better to be upfront about it instead of dance around the subject.

"The scar from the reactor?" Peter questioned, gesturing to his own chest. Tony nodded, "Yeah, it bothers me sometimes." Peter hesitated before walking closer, sitting on a free space on one of the tables in the lab.

"If you don't mind me asking, what does it feel like?"

Tony had to think before answering. "It varies. Sometimes it's a dull aching pain that grows and grows until you can't help but rub it, trying to ease the pain. Other times you think it's fine until out of nowhere you get this, sharp stabbing pain, almost like a really bad pinch. And it itches. More than anything else. You ever had chiggers?" Tony asked, and Peter shook his head. "Well, they're these little bugs that live in the grass and get under your skin and make you itch like you won't believe. Don't worry, they're not native to up here, they mostly live in the south, but one summer my parents had sent me to a ranch retreat. They thought the fresh air would do me good. I had a nice time, but one day I forgot to put on some bug spray, and the next morning I woke up with these giant bumps all over my body and they itched like nothing I've ever felt before. It kinda feels like that."

"...That sounds awful..." Peter finally spoke. Those were the only words that came to his mind.

Tony let out a short laugh, "Yeheah it does... When I had the arc in my chest, it took me some time to adjust. I had a hard time falling asleep because I wasn't used to the glow, so Pepper got me a night mask to sleep with. And whenever it got to be bad weather, it ache deep into my chest, and the metal would settle into my bones, and sometimes I wouldn't be able to function, so I'd just lay on the couch in the lab away from everyone." He spared a glance over at Peter to gauge how he was handling the information. The teen sat there listening to every word he said, a serious expression on his face. Tony continued.

"Every time that it got real quiet I could hear it. A soft buzz, kind of like an empty gymnasium. When I was with other people, I could tell they could hear it. Steve especially. He could tell I was coming before I even entered the room. After the fight in New York when everyone was living in the tower, I noticed how they reacted when I was in the same room. They'd watch me from the corner of their eye, and when they didn't think I was looking I'd catch them looking at the glow through my shirt. It wasn't just them, I know, it was everyone. But they tried to be so secretive about it. Like, why didn't they just ask about it if they wanted to know? So, uh, I appreciate you asking."

"Mr. Stark?"

"Yeah kid?"

"What's it like now that you don't have it anymore?"

"At first it was a little scary. I think I had grown attached to it: thought I'd die without it. But when it was gone... I kinda didn't know what to do. This thing in my chest that I had grown accustomed to was suddenly gone. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad I did it, it just took time to adjust. And because it's scar tissue and all, it's way more sensitive than the rest of my body, so when it itches, I can't really scratch it, I have to scratch around it. It can get really annoying and piss me off, so if I'm ever short or snappy with you for no reason just know I'm not mad at you."

Peter couldn't help the quirk of his lips and smiled as he said, "But you're always short." Tony narrowed his eyes at him in a glare, but the smile working at the corners of his mouth gave him away. He shoved him gently before reaching over to mess up his hair.

"At least I'm an adult." Peter snorted at that and giggled.

"Barely."

"I wouldn't be insulting the guy making upgrades to your suit."

"You wouldn't really do anything too drastic." Tony thought for a moment before shaking his head, "Nah. But hey, I just had a great idea! Y'know how Sam and Bucky always tease and prank you?"

Peter let out a groan, running a hand through his hair, "They're relentless." Tony smirked and threw an arm around him to pull him closer to himself. "The next time they try an' give you hell, just fill your shooters up with silly string and go wild." Peter couldn't help but grin at the mental image, "Ohokay Mr. Stark, will do."

Tony Stark was very familiar with bad days. He had more ups and downs than a roller coaster, and he honestly didn't know if he could make it through some days. But right here, right now things, were good. There was just something about the kid that healed Tony's fractured heart and busy mind.

And when summer came along and they were out by the pool, Tony had removed his shirt to swim and catch some rays. Peter saw the patch of fresh skin surrounded by a spiderwebbed network of scars covering the expanse of his chest.

"What do you miss about the arc?"